ADVrider (
-   Epic Ride Reports (
-   -   Big Lap of Ireland (

Irish1 03-19-2010 09:31 PM

I wandered Ireland in the 70's for 5 weeks. My last name is IRISH, so I won many a glass of Guiness when people disbelieved that was my true last name and made me pull out my Passport and California Driver's License. I hitch-hiked and walked, and everyone that picked me up drove like Jimmy Clark after 6 snifters, and talked about their families, and told me rivers to follow and Churches to see. I met Buffalo Bill Cody's nephew Willie Coidy in Inistioge and I told him my ancient Dad had helped Buffalo Bill on his horse farm in Altoona, Pennsylvania in the early 1900's. That occasioned a trip to the Pub in celebration of Cosmic Coincidence. :freaky Maybe Willie was having me on about being a nephew, but he was a funny, grizzled old Gent who could out-drink Kruschchev. Now WHY have I not gone back? If I'd bought three less bikes over the years I could've lived there awhile and won more Guiness! Thanks for your great story here. Good cheer to you.

Frey Bentos 03-20-2010 05:43 AM

Thanks chaps. Much appreciated.

locopostie 03-20-2010 07:11 AM


Originally Posted by Frey Bentos
I will re write it here to comply with swearing and stuff.

I like swearing and stuff, especially the stuff part, which is what I broke, while I was swearin.


Originally Posted by Frey Bentos

Clean, dry clothes are a luxury that seperates us from the Apes.

You haven't met my brother, it would take a lot more that dry clothes to distinguish him from an ape.

Great RR look forward to reading more

Dr LC8 03-20-2010 08:45 AM

That is a nice lap.

Did the same two years back:



MonsterTorch 03-20-2010 09:00 AM

Sounds like it was a gret trip! Thanks for sharing!!!

blackbirdzach 03-20-2010 09:14 AM


Originally Posted by Frey Bentos
Onwards around the coast. I passed by the Cliffs of Moher. I didn't stop as I had been there a few times and to tell the truth once you've seen one set of thousand high cliffs you've seen them all...
Here's a pic from an earlier visit. They are pretty feckin good though.

WOW! :eek1

Added Cliffs of Moher to my bucket list. Thanks for the report and pics!

Frey Bentos 03-20-2010 11:29 AM

@locopostie. Pfffft.:rofl
Just looking at the photo of the cliffs closer. You can see the scale because there are loads of wee people on top of one....

Frey Bentos 03-20-2010 11:55 AM

As it usually does, morning dawned early the next, er morning. I sprang out of bed, done my usual 300 crunches followed by 400 push ups. Checking my finely honned body by the early morning sunlight in the full lenght mirror I gently awoke the landladys eighteen year old daughter with the best sex she will ever be party to in her life. ....
As it usually does, rain lashed the window of the damp bedroom I was lying in. I turned over in the tiny bed, cramps from the undercooked chicken i ate last night wracked my body as i prayed for death.....
Actually, suprising as it is, none of the above actually happened. It was a nice enough morning. A great fry up and an early morning dump the size of a small south American country set me up for a splendid day on the bike. I did catch a glimpse of the landlady's pussy though...

Today I was going to tackle the Ring proper. First things first I hit The Conor Pass. This is a pass, obviously. Lesson over. It is like an alpine pass in minature. Very pretty and what's better, peppered with bicyclers. It still gives me a schoolboys sense of smug glee to overtake those poor sweating people as they saw the organs off themselves struggling up hills. When the hill in questioin goes on for a mile up the side of a very steep mountain, all the better

There was no sign of Fungie. A bottle nosed dolphin that is quite the tourist attraction in the bay. He has been there for a few years. But I suppose I was on top of a mountain, a habitate rarley visited by dolphins so fair's fair.
Anyway, I kinda done a figure of eight with the roads and circumnavigated the ring of Kerry. The morning was shaping up noicly to be, noice. The road was narrow and twisty, sticking to the side of the mountain quite heroicaly I thought. Making it easy for Moi and the Americans* to gawp and ooh and aah at the sea.

*could have been Canadians either but , who can tell the difference anyway?

In this next pic I am modeling a new line in helmet diffusers. Helps sort out the drag I get on my awesome machine...

Frey Bentos 03-20-2010 12:03 PM

Even though It wasn't that great a distance it took a fair bit of the morning to get round. I went off the "main" road a couple of times to follow roads and paths that would make a mountain goat dizzy. Utilising my superb machine control I spawned my way round, down, in and out of a few tight spots. And came to a couple of dead ends as well.

It was a great day, me nose was sunburned, I had taken several wee's out in the open. worried a few sheep and I landed in Bantry in the late afternoon.
Bantry was even harder to get a B&B in than Dingle. You would think that in a country that is struggling to keep visitors coming to it, it would lay on a few more houses for us. Anyway, When I did eventually find a B&B it was in a small housing estate and the door was answered by a young lady in a very short skirt.
So no harm done. Anyhow, I got a really strange room up a narrow flight of extra stairs that had been sort of tacked onto the landing at the top of the origonal stairs. I had to follow the lassie up them. .
Needless to say, been a happily married man and a gentleman to boot, I looked at my feet as we ascended the stairs. And just to prove it, here is a picture of my feet. On a bed.

I had a power nap because I was pooped. The day had been so hot I was out like a light until 8 or so that night. After a shower and a change into civvies I took the bike into the centre of the town. It is a really nice place. It is set out in a wide oval with a raised pedestrian plaza in the middle. I parked the bike and wondered around looking for a place to eat. Fed and watered I returned to the plaza type place and had a celebratory cigar. As I was sitting looking around me I was approached by a rough country fellow who started to ask me a hundred questions about the bike. The smell of drink was pretty strong and he exuded an air of not giving a whole pile of fucks. I seem to attract these people. After making my excuses and fecking off I retired to the B&B where another huge crap rounded orf the day and dreams of an angel dressed in a short skirt filled my innocent head all night.

Irish John 03-20-2010 05:55 PM


Originally Posted by Frey Bentos
So I rolled into Clifden and up to the B&B. I parked up and removed my helmet. The rain was still pissing down and I performed the comedy emptying of sleeves for the amusement of a small dog that looked just how I felt.

As I rang the doorbell I prepared the old "These aren't the droids you are looking for." Jedi Mind trick, in a "this person is dry as a bone and won't drip half an ocean across your nice clean house", stylee.

The door was opened, not by the fox but by her Mother. That's okay though, she was hot for an old bird. I smiled and tried to convey "dryness" as water ran down my face.
"Room?" I enquired, trying to look like the cat from Shrek. She smiled and beckoned me in.

What a strange feeling. Dryness. I checked out the room she offered, knowing full well that even if it contained several lions and a shark or two, she didn't have the physical strength to get me out into the rain again.

I went back to the front door to collect my back pack and coat and saw that it was lying in a pool of water. She saw it as well but didn't say a word.

The one good thing about the house is that there was a large hot press that served as a drying room. I deposited the coat, gloves and trousers and then retired to the room for a shower.

Several hours in torrential rain does strange things to a man's body. All I can say is that if I were to have dropped dead there and then, somewhere on the autopsy report it would have said " No visible sign of external genitalia."
It took a half hour in a steaming hot shower for anything to put in an appearance. And even then it was the size of a tom cats nipple and a worrying shade of grey..

Clean, dry clothes are a luxury that seperates us from the Apes. I had a power nap after phoning home and telling The Waife all about my exploits. I had made up my mind that if tomorrow is as wet, then I am heading home. There would be no point in going on as I couldn't bloody see anything today.

The rain abated enough for me to stroll the half mile or so down to Clifden's main drag and have a steak the size of a small dog. I staggerd home holding my belly button in and slept the sleep of a sleepy thing.

Hopefully tomorrow would be better.

So which BB did you stay? Wondered if it might be one owned by a friend of ours.

Irish John 03-20-2010 06:08 PM


Originally Posted by blackbirdzach
WOW! :eek1

Added Cliffs of Moher to my bucket list. Thanks for the report and pics!

The Tourist Board will nick you for 6 Euros to park and 8 Euros to enter now. It's a real shame. Used to just pull over and walk to the brink when I was younger.

drsales 03-20-2010 06:35 PM

Like a true tourist, my brother and I slid up to the edge of the cliffs and hung our head over the edge looking 600 feet or so down to the ocean. That was a major WOW!!! Plus geat golfing nearby.

Orangeskull 03-20-2010 08:28 PM

Great read, keep it coming

Had the pleasure of visting your country about 8 years ago. It seemed like every corner had some kind of castle or rather the remains of one anyway. Spent Halloween night at Lesile Castle. That was a blast. Of course getting picked to be the taste tester at Bushmills didnt suck either. :freaky

Frey Bentos 03-21-2010 02:56 PM

This part of Ireland, the south east coast is made entirely of little sticky out bits. And I was trying to get round them all. This meant that my progress wasn't as quick as I thought it would be. I wasn't complaining, I was enjoying it big time but I was suprised at how long it was taking. Anyhow, I hugged the coast all morning. I even had to get past this speed demon.

Honest to feck, this guy was a complete knobhead. He was at the head of about twenty cars, wobbling about at 40mph. No body could get past him. I took this pic and then went by. I gave him a wave and the surly git just stared at me. Honestly some times handle bars are wasted on some people..
Anyhow, I meanderedd my way down to Mizen Head. There is a big Light House here because the locals said it was too dark at night or something. I was told but wasn't listening.
They do tours around it, and you get to see a really really great rope type bridge over to it because it is built on a craggy rock. But they wanted a couple of euros for it so i thought "fuck 'em" and went and had an over priced chicken paninni in the tea shop instead.
It is a pretty dangerous piece of water though and the wind out on the end of the peninsula was brutal, even on the calm sunny day when I was there.

More wee roads followed as I traced the coast around and on towards Skibbereen.

I was aiming for Carrigaline in Cork, to stay with my brother and family for a couple of nights.
The weather was continuing to stay nice and I motored on in happychap mode.
As I got nearer to Carragaline I had to Stop in a place called Ballinspittle. This name to any one from Ireland is pretty (in)famous, if they think about it. In the mid to late eighties I think it was, there was a huge wave of excitement in certain circles in Ireland as a certain statue in a small groto in a small village grabbed the attention of regular church goers across the country. This was the phenomina(num?) of the Moving Statue.
A few people praying at the foot of a statue of Our Lady saw it move. Pretty soon thousands of people had gathered there and were witnessing it for themselves. There were masses and prayers and people saying it was a sign and that it was the end of the world and that it was the second coming etc.

Now, anybody who has read any thing else that I have posted on here ( Other forum where I have made my views on the religion that I was brought up in quite clear..)could probably guess my oppinion of it all. I would be a lapsed/failed/disilusioned catholic. The brother that i was going to see had been married a few years before and so we were all down in Cork for the wedding. On the night of the wedding some body suggested as a joke of going out to see "Bopping Mary" as she was known as. So three car loads of sniggering people went out to see it. Some whad been drinking heavily( it was an Irish wedding) and some like myself were stone cold sober. Everybody saw the statue move. It was quite strange really. Take the piss if you want, but me and my brother in law climbed up to it. It is a normal concrete statue about 4foot high. Solid as a rock. Standing back from it by a couple of foot you could see it move. But the person beside it, with their hand on it felt nothing. We swapped places a dozen times. Same thing. The lights shining on it, didn't move, it wasn't shadows making it look like it moved.
If you had two projectors with the same image shining on the same spot and wobbled one, that is the only way I can describe it. Very strange.
Dont know what it meant or why it happened. If it is a sign, it was going on a year after the wedding when me and wifey went out there again.
/religious ferver.

Anyway, I went to me brothers house and they were all suprisingly glad to see me. It was a friday when I landed and I didn't really do much spinning about for the weekend. It was good to get a day or two off the bike. I have two nephews down in cork. They are cracked on football. Soccer , that is and Man United. There is a large soccer scheme in Cork for the kids and on sunday morning I went out to see it..

Two hundred kiddies all screaming for the ball. Kinda scary really.. Anyway, Monday morning and I hit the road. The landscape, whilst still pretty nice was changing. It was harder to keep to the coast roads and when I was on them, they weren't the twisting, empty roads of the west coast. Although they did throw up the occasional gem

I was heading towards Waterford but had a bit to go. The traffic can be pretty heavy for a country boy like moi and the weather was starting to close in again.

This picture above was in Youghal. A town I cant remember much about except that i was standing on the pegs trying to let me love spuds swing to get some feeling back into them and I went past a Garda Station and three cops stopped talking ansd watched me go passed.
ANARCHY! So I sat down quickly and nearly split a stone as I sat on it..

The going was quicker on the good roads and I was soon motoring out past Waterford. There was no point in ferreting out coast roads as there was a sea mist as thick as um, thick fog closing in.
I got to another wee ferry as I headed for Wexford.

I was heading for a town that I had discovered on the map, only because it's name amused me. "Wellington Bridge" was where I was going to lay my wee head down that night. Hopefully

Digger Deep 03-21-2010 03:21 PM

Homesick now............but a real nice report.

Times are GMT -7.   It's 12:09 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ADVrider 2011-2015