View Single Post
Old 09-20-2009, 06:17 PM   #192
planktonnn OP
.also, i am a twat
 
planktonnn's Avatar
 
Joined: Jan 2008
Location: ...Fuckinemshite...
Oddometer: 3,593
Cool2

Quote:
Originally Posted by pjcr12
As with all Global Corporations, it may sometimes happen that vital parts may not be where they were thought to be....
Well, here @ the Assembly Line (my shed) we suspected they might not be here so didn't bother looking. You see, there was no chitty. If they were here there'd have to be a chitty, but chitty there was nothing whatever at all, blank, void, vacant, without a particle. None? Absent, non-resident, empty, nobody. Not a soul? Truant, missing, deserted, the bird has flown. None? Nothing. Tenant-less, devoid, minus, removed, exiled, elsewhere. Transferred? Misplaced, stayed away, nowhere to be found. Lost? Rejected, discharged, omitted, forgotten. Nothing. Evicted? Rooted out. Weeded out. Sent to Coventry. Brushed aside, bundled away, struck off the roll. Murdered whilst sleeping. Spat out. Blasted out. Flung out. Gone. Plucked from beneath our very noses. Bereft of life. A beggarly account of empty boxes. Incomplete. Ill furnished. Impoverished. Empty handed. Starved. Under fed. Under nourished. Undesired. Old mother Hubbard's famous empty cupboards. Scarce, cast off. Trash, inoperative. Inadequate, superfluous. Aborted. Terminated. Sterile. Impotent. Good for nowt. No, not here. Never. Nothing.

I must say I did heartily suspect you had purloined the O rings almost immediately I noticed them gone, but thought it good sense to scan the floor just so I was utterly justified in making a citizens arrest of some considerable disproportionate force & and calling the Pollis on the 'Twat Phone', a direct line to the Cuntstabulary I have for such regrettable occasions. As you know, I do so love the 'Blue Community', they're not at all the egoist maniacal thugs & un-badged stick wielding army plants they're portrayed as when filmed by the public killing the public and stuff. I really do think it should be illegal to film the police and I can't conceive of any reason why that might be a problem.

Now I'm guessing you did, what with your arts professional lateral thinking capability, and the certificates and such, but you haven't specifically stated whether you tried the plastic inlet-tract pipe-ulations on the opposite sides? Do feel free to shoot me down with a well placed hiding of O rings at some future point, but you don't actually mention it so I can't rule it out, and if you're going to submit sub standard Installation Report Diagnostic Statements to the Central Research Administration & Distribution Directorate, (the ADV shed) we must ensure that they meet the policies & standards deliberated over & ratified by the Board. Please note that if this happens again you will be subject to 4 years workplace bullying, followed by a sham redundancy & appeal process, and will then be made to walk away fully vindicated with a substantial compensation package and a 14 page severance & confidentiality agreement, before anyone with the power to bollock anyone responsible finds out even a whiff of what's happened.

In reference to your buy out offer, I can only imagine you have typo'd the figures the wrong way round? If you persist with this kind of sloppy work, the Board may consider an unfortunate but unavoidable permanent transfer to the 'Yo Mamma' department.

And now a picture. Someone we know has been talking about making a Beemer Boober or something like that? http://www.bikeexif.com/dbbp-bmw-bobber
Attached Images
 
__________________
...using the wrong spanner since 1964...

planktonnn screwed with this post 09-21-2009 at 05:40 AM Reason: No spell check in adv editor?, & to edit, no?
planktonnn is offline   Reply With Quote