Originally Posted by AKBeemer
Dear Mr. Duc,
Since one of the areas I oversee at UAF is campus housing, I did a little digging in our records. Looks like you may owe us a considerable little sum for an incident you were involved in. I don't want to embarrass you and violate your confidentiality, but you know the incident I'm talking about... the one involving the freshman girl, vomit and the goat.
You'll probably need to narrow it down a little more, like - was the freshman girl blond, brunette, or red head; was the goat a billy or nanny; did this take place on the roof of the dorms or in the parking lot at midnight? From the stories AKDuc has told, it could have been any of quite a few incidents in his otherwise wasted youth.