I have a XR650R, and recently acquired a 2005 KLR in a trade. If I could only have one, I would opt for something in the middle. The XR is a blast to ride, but commuting sucks. The KLR is a great commuter and backroad bike, not the greatest off-road.
I'm voting DR based on what I've read. Plus your wife has one, so that's a pretty big bonus I think. Parts interchange if needed, swap bikes if needed, farkles fit both bikes for testing purposes, etc.