Oh madhouse STOP being so hard on yourself. If anything you are part of a wonderful moto community that help each other out when in need.
We all do a sport that is possible dangerous and we all acknowledge it, accept it and are very willing to take it on
Besides as I saw a couple of weekends ago, you could be standing under a deck watching friends have fun and the damn deck FALL on you!! You just NEVER know what life will bring you. BUT if you have friends and family around you to pick you up, wipe you off and carry you on your way.....NOW that is something
as the ole' saying... SHIT HAPPENS.