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Old 02-18-2013, 05:19 AM   #354
Beastly Adventurer
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Joined: Feb 2009
Oddometer: 4,150
I've known two people that have owned HP2's and ridden with them. They have each given me their testimonies on condition of remaining anonymous.

One is in HP2 recovery, the other was able to quit "cold turkey" and didn't require intervention.

This is what they have to say:

There is an interesting habit among HP2 owners which is best observed through a mathematical formula to explain the fascinating physics behind this symbiotic relationship that defines the man/machine interface.

S = ckA

That should get you close enough to begin. After listening to there hours of HP2 monologues I have been able to come to the following conclusions. No government agencies were involved, and there remains only a lingering doubt or two as to whether or not any animals were harmed during the creation of the HP2.

The HP2 redefines the sciences. The boys in Spandau had no idea what they were really creating, it should have been born in a lab in a dark and creepy forest in Romania. They came up with a machine that runs not entirely on fuel, but on an otherworldly amount of currency, blood, sweat, tears, and sheer human emotion.

So what is the HP2?

It was a machine built for a tiny niche market that was never really studied closely. But actually existed all along!

It was a machine that encompassed cutting edge state of the art engineering and production methods, yet required constant and costly further refinement on the part of those participating as owners in the project's life history.

It was a machine that transcended astro physics in that it is a true black hole that is touchable and easy to observe even inside a garage.

In the realm of economics it is equaled only by boats used as pleasure craft in being able to make huge sums of any currency totally disappear without any trace and without any warning!

Artistically speaking, it would have taken Da Vinci, the Marquis de Sade, Howard Hughes, and Satan himself to work together as a team for at least a few decades to come up with something that could rival it.

In the field of international relations, not even the Japanese would hazard a guess as to what the original engineers were thinking when the HP2 was drawn up.

In literary terms, it is as if it had sprung forth from the fertile imaginations of the late Dr. Michael Crichton, Isaac Asimov, and Salvador Dali.

Musically speaking, it is as well understood as a Theremin instrument.

Modern day religion has no known parallel in the HP2's ability to invoke a cult following.

Not even Alvin Toffler saw it coming.

It defies logic.
It defies description.
Yet, it lives among us.
Be afraid.
It's gonna mess you up, boy!
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