Trust me. I notice most things people do not and get bothered by small details. People constantly remind me of this. It depends if I am willing to put the cost and effort into fixing them, but I always notice them. Anybody think letting air pressure out of their forks is noticeable? Most think not. I find there is a huge difference once the temp has come up to equalize the pressure to ATM. This has to be done AT operating tempand during the ride to work.
Lets just say we agree to disagree. Everybody should tailer their suspension to how and what they ride. I have both firmer off-road suspension and a plusher set-up. While there is benefit to both, I feel my soft suspension on my XRR reduces its ability in more places then where it gains from being softer. That being said I did a 26,000km trip on it with plenty of very, very bumpy roads and it handled that great and my fillings likely thank me. It's also done many Moab's and Baja's trails, as well as countless mountain passes in our own back yard. If only it was a bit firmer it would be the do-it-all suspension for me.
In regards to oil, I'm not talking about just changing oil. I'm saying using thinner oil and tayloring the shim stack for the lighter oil. It's what I did with my XRR, but my springs are a bit too light, up front for sure, and with load both front and back. If you look at viscocity curves, the thicker oil goes from thick to very thin with a mild temp swing. The thinner oil will change much, much less. Shear as it may, that's a wear property. Not a changing property on every ride.