So I and Ladislav (The Slovakian Princess’s boyfriend) headed of in the tractor on a search & recovery mission deep behind enemy lines of the Slovakian Mountains to find located and get eyes on the Sputnik Explorer who we planned to liberate from our foe and common enemy the notorious and deadly Erzberg “U” shaped pass…… Well not quit like this but it kind of felt like this to me
So once we found the Sputnik Explorer I rushed over and quickly picked her up carrying out a quick scan for any life threatening wounds she could have sustained during our last assault of the Erzberg, after I checked her over I looked over at Ladislav who already was wasting no time by putting my soft panniers and other items in the cab of his well equipment assault vehicle, the Slovakian version of a T34 tank but in the wood/log cutter trim.
We then tried to put her on the front of the Slovakian assault vehicle however as this was the wood/log cutter version it had no front bucket so would not fit, there was a few seconds silence but I had a feeling what was coming. Ladislav pointed up at the Erzberg and then back at me and then what happened next was pure genius, with hand gestures and drawing in the mud with sticks we devised a master plan some might say the plan of plans...
I was to gun it up the Erzberg on the Sputnik Explorer carrying out a surprise attack firing on all cylinders (well just one 400cc cylinder) catching it off guard and Ladislav would storm up behind me and once the Sputnik Explorer caught up too much flak and I bailed off Ladislav was to hold the back of the bike and then we would both go either side and start her back up walking her up the hill with me operating the clutch and throttle to the top where we would claim our victory. It was on!!!!
One on one, me and my nemesis the “Erzberg” going toe to toe (well not technically as I had Ladislav with me), so I headed over to the sputnik explorer moving my head side to side from shoulder to shoulder like a Olympic athlete about to give it his all and then Ladislav looked over at me with a stone cold icy stare and with the nod of his head I knew he was ready.
I then mounted the Sputnik Explorer (on the left side as I learnt from my mistake mounting on the right side in Belgium) and put my hands on the grips and moved them slowly in an strange romantic and kind of erotic way to the top of the headlight fairing tapping it letting her know I was ready and wishing her all the best as we both knew this could be the end of the trip right here as one of us might not make it through the other side
I then looked down at the floor silently feeling the same feeling I used to feel as a kid when I was a amateur boxer about to walk into the ring then with my right hand held out vertical and with a clenched fist I raised my thumb as far back and vertical as it would go to let Ladislav know I’m ready, it was a thumbs up that even Marvick of top gun would be proud off.
I then started her up building the revs up alittle and then dumped the clutch making the most of the hard ground we placed the bike on making my surprise attack with all cylinders firing (again just one 400cc cylinder as mentioned before, it’s a single cylinder bike) this time I got half way up before bailing off and as discussed Ladislav was storming right up behind me stopping the bike falling back as we righted her up and with one each side holding her firm I then started her up holding the clutch in and controlling the throttle as we walked her up however the rear wheel bogged down she stalled again but without any delay and true heroism Ladislav showed his true colours as a rufty tufty wood cutter and with super human strength he lifted her out and then shouted a war cry I will never forget until the end of my days which to me was the green light for Go Go Go!!!
So I started her back up and we then walked her to the top and together we both defeated our “Erzberg” (or small muddy hill) !!!!!!
Once at the top Ladislav gave me direct orders with hand signals the directions to the house as we would now split as he would take another route back, I watched Ladislav get in his tractor and as we made eye contact before I set of we both could tell we now had the 1000 yard stare and a bond that would last a life time.
So once back at the house Ladislavs other 2 brothers turned up to see who this lone traveller was along with some other people and they offered me more food and coffee again as I prepped the DRZ for traveling again, they also offered me to stay the night however I really felt like I did not want to impose and also I had a slight feeling they thought I was a little crazy as we probably all would if some random foreign guy just turned up in the middle of nowhere with his motorbike stuck in the mud saying he is heading to Tajikistan for no real reason on his own. So once the bike was ready I thanked them and hoped on the Sputnik Explorer. They then looked at me and ask where to next from here.
I asked how far Ukraine is and what direction, or is Poland closer? The Slovakian Princess smiled and said Poland is closer and gave me rough directions so I then thanked them all and headed off.
It started to get dark so the new plan of the hour was to gun it to Poland and then find somewhere to stay.
On route to Poland
So Poland it is then……………………………………