Why are most men so emasculated?

I'd rather have 7-11 coffee.

My 10 cent yes/no test is surely not scientific in any manner, but more of the stuff I look at to determine how manly a man really is. It is not the type bike/car he owns or if he drinks 5$ coffees. Who gives a shit on that? So quit your fucking bashing.

In all seriousness and back to the OP point of this thread...
Rather than why are so men emasculated, lets look at what makes a man manly.

Manly is an adjective used to describe the physical and psychological characteristics of individuals traditionally associated with men such as courage and strength. Manliness differs from masculinity in that the latter refers to a simple biological predestination while the former is often used to describe the more sublime ideals of qualities traditionally specific to men. All males are masculine as they are sexually male. Yet manliness looks down upon males not exhibiting full native characteristics. (thus my 10 cent questionnaire).

Here is a more scientific approach/wording if you desire:

• The manly male does not obsess over losing physical looks, and is not obsessed with physical appearance or the natural process of aging. Conversely, the metro sexual male has emerged in recent years by panty-waste males obsessing over looks and fashion. i.e. more than 40$ for jeans.
• To be a mature man, one must be committed to his family by contributing to it however he may. i.e. Mow your lawn, wash your car, maintain your vehicles, know how to fix stuff, spendign time with your family, kids, etc.
• It is manly to be calm, provide emotional support for those in need, and not be weepy. Knowing when to empathize shows a true man. i.e telling a friend "that sucks" when he jsut wrecked his bike and meaning it.
• Manliness is logical, intellectual, rational, objective and practical, not overtly emotional. Not a lot of logical thinking or practically in our culture today. These 4 values have nearly become obsolete within the youths of our nation.
• A man seeks leadership roles such as guiding, disciplinarian, independent, free, individualistic, demanding. When is the last time you gave your kid a whipping for being bad or breaking the rules? HMMM! If you are under a certain age then it is doubtful you ever saw a switch or belt on your ass as a kid. Today's youths are given time-outs and ridlin instead of a old fashioned spanking.
• Manliness is self-satisfied in that it does not seek nor need the approval of others. Here is the pussy whipped part that the earlier posts stumbled with. Men seeking the ultimate approval of other men or women and not "being their own man" - a term lost on most younger men today.
• The manly consider risking loss to stand for important beliefs or principles. i.e If you don't stand for something then you stand for nothing.

..just my .02 worth...

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Stepping off my soapbox.

Thus +1

and

Getting old is mandatory, growing up is optional.

Being a man is not the same as being an ass.

PhilB

Holy hell. Just measure dicks and be done with it.

Umm...If you really give enough of a crap to even ponder all this for much longer than it takes to read it, you need to give your man-card back.

A lot of people miss this. Many people, especially modern westernized women, even try to manipulate guys by telling them they're being an ass whenever they're not being a pushover. I often tell these would-be manipulators to go fuck themselves. Telling somebody "no" doesn't necessarily mean that you're an ass. Disagreeing doesn't necessarily make you an ass either.

'Doesn't mean you're not though.

Apparently being manly means being trapped in the 1950's. No thanks.


That road leads to men being disposable and women being fragile caged creatures. No thanks - enjoy your Ward Cleaver fantasy, though.

Instructions? what instructions.
Hmmm.They look like simple questions to me.

Looks like I hit a nerve somewhere...............if the shoe fits, put it on.

This is getting funny.

Getting in touch with your feminine side to show how secure you are in your masculinity.

Does a real man hang his "manhood checklist" on the refrigerator?

This thread is many things

- funny in places
- true as heck in places
- sad in places
- and just plain wrong in a few places

Some guys seem to be worried about "showing everyone I'm a man, dammit!"

That's almost as bad as the wimps that left their spouses override them on everything.

After 27 years of (not always perfect) marriage my wife and I had a discussion about me getting a motorcycle. Although she strongly disagreed with the idea she KNEW for sure I had biker DNA when we got married (had a few bikes then and for a few years after we got married). We are both smart enough to not try to control each other with ultimatums or 'you will nots."

I have put over 7,000 miles on my new bike since I bought it in April. She's a lot happier after my 100 mile / day commute was done most of the summer at over 50 mpg vs my 30 mpg car/

Why did I NOT have one for a large number of years in between ?
Simple, I was in the military and got either moved overseas or deployed too much to want to mess with it. And when I was home, I wanted to spend time with my wife and kids...not my motorcycle.

And - many men today ARE emasculated !

J

WTF are people doing 10's of thousands in debt because of a new truck & boat??? Why would someone ever assume more debt to get a moto (w/the exception of some poor Indian family for which it'd make a major difference in quality of life/financial opportunity)?

You should never let your mortgage exceed 25% of your take home pay and should not consider any major frivolous purchases before you have at least 4 to 6 months living expenses in the bank.

As soon as you start living a month or two from bankruptcy, those asshole have you right where they want you, no wonder this country is so fucked up.

The Jo momma argument could be made for this whole thread. I am surprized you didn't make the same reply to Rob. G. But yeah, you are probably right, even tho' I didn't start it. This whole forum has become much too JM'ed over time & I should not contribute to the degeneration. Moto technique is only a side note here anymore.

A.
There ARE controlling womens and spineless men (and vice-versa). A neighbor who wanted a motorcycle was living with a woman who wouldn't even let him listen to the radio. :huh Motorcycle was WAY out of the question. If he had stayed he'd fit the title of this thread, but he didn't. He is now married to another woman who lets him be himself and he is spending his time building their house (so still no motorcycle, but the motivation is different).

B.
The lists of what it means to be a man are really funny. My dad is disappointed in me for a lot of reasons including:

1. I ride a motorcycle.
2. I don't ride a Harley (which is pretty odd considering #1 in this list).
3. I sit up straight in the car with 2 hands on the wheel (as opposed to one wrist draped over the wheel).
4. My boxers and boxer-briefs aren't tighty-whities.
5. . . . .

I could go on, but I think the pattern is that when a person knows the ONE RIGHT WAY to do things it becomes easier to denigrate other ways. The pattern applies to subjects that have NOTHING to do with being a man.

Most of us have moral and ethical reasoning and if we pay attention we can do what is right and still do things different from our neighbor. Or we can try to make everyone adhere to our list and call them names if they don't.

I often think that it's the insecure and cowardly guys who adhere to the "manly" ways and it takes far more courage to follow one's own conscience if that means doing things differently.

I keep my daily copy tucked safely inside my man-bag.

As sad as it is, the last time I was around my non-motorcyclist dad (he's never owned one, and can barely even ride a bicycle) and he labeled the bike I rode up to visit him on as a 'pussy' motorcycle (to his brother on the phone... I overheard the conversation) was the last time I chose to be around him, or speak with him.

I don't consider 'men' to be guys who are afraid to take chances, or afraid to live. After decades of his negative rants (this is a guy who called Fred Rogers ... yeah, Mr. Rogers for cryin' out loud... no good... although he used more derogatory terms), while labeling a motorcycle was not a huge error, it was enough for me to say 'goodbye.'

I've known good men who never owned an American bike out of the many they have owned and raced, like the father of my high school buddy who had also been a Green Beret in Vietnam... and here was my own father spouting off some shit and opinions for something he couldn't even do, and was scared to try, himself (i.e. ride).

I won't call myself a man for doing it, since it still makes me sick to think about it, but it seems to me that at some point real men have to look past what they were raised in, and find a way to grow to be something more. Granted, that is a biased viewpoint based on what I hope was an atypical upbringing, and while I've been told they don't exist - I still believe that there are fathers out there who make so much sense that their offspring have little to question or change.

If you have to do something to feel manly
Then you may have issues

I was born male
I'm not changing any parts
I'll die a male

Before I ever got a motorcycle I was dating a girl who refused to allow me to get one. I hated it. Thus, two weeks after we broke up, I got one and never looked back.

I told the current GF(and future wife) that I will always have a motorcycle and it's my passion and I will always ride. Her answer was "good, do what makes you happy". She has never complained when I've bought one, or bought parts. She is a keeper.

My best friend sold his so he could pay for "his wife's kitchen". He sold his motorcycle, something he was passionate about, loved, and which allowed us to spend hours wrenching and being guys, because his wife wanted a new kitchen. She refuses to allow him to buy another one, and he just makes excuses why he doesn't get one. He is the sole reason I fear getting married, to be in his shoes. NEVER!

1. She isn't your wife yet, or
2. you have a good life insurance policy she'd be able to afford her kitchen makeover with