Stupid questions people ask you when stopped

I had an odd encounter the other day

I was at a pub for a classic bike meet and I decided to go on my (kickstart only) supermoto which doesn't always play ball when starting from cold. An older guy comes up to me and wants to chat about bike things then he becomes an expert mechanic and starts pointing out all of the things that are "wrong" with my bike. The chain is too loose, the chain is rubbing on the tyre, the tyre is too close to the swingarm, your numberplate is too small.... I decided to bail out at that point as my friends had left me alone with this guy who was starting to make me feel uncomfortable! I hop on, give it a few kicks and get nothing back. I decompress, try again, still nothing. While I am fiddling with the choke he walks back over looking very concerned and spits this gem out

"Oh no! Has someone STOLEN YOUR SPARK PLUG?"

I am pleased to say that nobody stole my spark plug, my chain is not too loose nor are my tyres rubbing on anything and I made it home safely!

Not a stupid question but here's my stupid answer.

My K75 contains parts from lord knows how many different bikes/years so whenever somebody inevitably asks what year it is:

Me: "About twelve."

Then I explain that it's a Frankenbike.

This Johnny Cash song is for you:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWHniL8MyMM

Most importantly, the answer is always "No."

What about..."I'll think about it and get back to you. See ya!" VROOM.........

Good Lord. What sort of cretins are you dealing with that would offer violence when (correctly) denied permission to ride your motorcycle?

Haha. Jim's suggestion was a bit more than denial of permission.

I had a situation today that cracked me up. There were two Mormon guys that were biking down the neighborhood. My mailbox is at the end of the street, and I gave a friendly wave to them when I got my mail. When I got to my house, I quickly started getting my gear on to go ride. I had forgotten about them whilst putting my boots on by the door, and with all my gear except for one boot on, a knock came to the door. I answered and remembered. I treat these guys respectfully. Only one of them was doing the talking, and he was clearly very nervous. After about 30 seconds, he posed a question to me, and I indicated that I wasn't interested. Then, as I'm about to close the door, the guy in the back (who hadn't said a word yet), yells "what kind of bike do you ride?" I told him and closed the door. I couldn't contain my laughter once it was shut. Nothing wrong with asking, but he clearly wasn't too focused on his mission at hand

I'm not so sure.

On the face of it the mission is to go out and convert heathen. At that level, you're dead right.

But on a much deeper level I am sure that the mission is to take sheltered young boys from Utah and turn them into confident young men who are comfortable in their faith and culture as Mormons in the larger world beyond Utah, and who are better equipped for a lifetime of interacting with, and sometimes even converting the heathens.

And on that level, while he might not have been doing what he'd been told to go out and do, I suspect he was doing exactly what his elders wanted him to do.

My Mormon story dates back to 1980 when there was a knock at the door nearly 10,000 miles from Utah and one of my friends opened the door; the conversation went like this:

"Hi, we're from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and we'd like to talk to you about Gaaard."
"That's nice, we're not, no thank you, goodbye."

I'm sure that like me, the mormons were still processing what he had said after the door had closed.

one of my favorite stories to tell is the guy who pulled up beside me in a monstrous harley branded ford diesel with an ultra classic in the back and yells: buy a real bike".(i was on a ducati at the time) I yelled back" i did, I just didnt have enough money for a new truck to haul it in so im riding this one instead." his girlfriend/wife laughed so loud i could hear her over the sound of the diesel screeching away from the light.

I walked in to the diner I eat breakfast at almost every day. It was 11*f and snowing out. One asked me where I parked my bike. I was in my ford as usual for this time of year, but they know I rode most of the year.

Its a LONG winter with a new bike in the garage just waiting......

David

I'm gonna have to print up that quote and tape it to my bike to use at a later date

Man, I am never that quick witted when it comes to shit like that.

I was at my local BMW dealer in the show room, sitting on the new R1200GSA I just bought. The red SOLD sticker had just been hung on the rear view mirror. Another customer in the store walked up:

Other customer: "That is a nice bike".
Me: "yeah, I just bought it."
Other customer: " do you have a job?"
Me: "yes, I have a job".

In hind sight, I find it unusual that people do not connect working and jobs with the freedom to play and do what they want.

how in the hell would you be able to afford a GSA without one Or at least without working at one for many years for that retirement thing

At which point our responses would have diverged.
"What sort of fu**ing question is that?" was the first thing that came into my mind when I read this. Theree is no way that is anything but disrespectful, regardless of the angle.

What does that even mean? The question wouldn't make me mad, just confused...:huh

Well played! You made that idiots day with his wife laughing at him too.

Fixed

My take is he is asking if you are free to take the world tour. Many folks say they will retire or take a few years off, buy the GS and then take off for a protracted tour. So that would be my guess as to the motive he had.

So maybe the question should have been, "Are you going to ride it around the world?"
Which of course would have still ended up in this thread. lol

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Is this your first Beemer?
This is actually common. Maybe not those exact words but many Beemer owners are retired and ride a lot. And you do not have to be old to be retired.