Detroit to San Diego, Zen and the art of motorcycle negligence,

<------ Proud long-time owner of a "Rabid Cack Fan" t-shirt.

Good to see you on the interwebz again, Reverend Vermin.

The latest Cackmods are Fab! If you have not yet attempted it, find foil from nearby dumpster, (or backyard) wrap loosely around corn cob (preferably whole) and place in oven/exhaust (Cackiln?) and grill for approximately *preferred doneness miles.

*As an aspiring travel chef, I proudly cooked successfully in this fashion on my truck's exhaust manifolds (truckiln?) along with chili but transitioned to not doing that when the chili shorted out coils, starters, wiring harnesses and stuff after it escaped the can at great velocity due to exceeding preferred doneness miles.

There is an insidious rumor going around wherein The Verm - packing a holesaw on a cordless drill -
is actually SELLING key-fob-sized PIECES OF CACK to whosoever will! :eek1


Has it really come down to this?!?!?!



(And what will be the end result???)

This picture was taken just after I had kicked off the front lower radiator cowling. I pray to god no one from the Pacific Coast web site sees this or I will be lynched. The mere breaking off of a tab sends them into a state of apoplexy.

..... Thought no one else would dare use that word, it's one of my faves, along with verisimilitude.

I've spoken with my accountant. If I liquidate a few
of my retirement funds, I'll be able to free-up a small
chunk of the filthy lucre required to take possession of
said key fob.

Kindly add my name to the list of admirer/cannibals.

*(please don't drill into the gas tank for my day-glo morsel)*

ok ok it is true i will be selling bite size hunks of cack because

"THE END IS DEAR"

I was hanging out with some blokes at a campground in the mountains and layed out my plan to finance my next adventure (which ideally will be cacks last) by selling off cack one piece at a time. I call it the Lyndsey Lohan approach, fame will consume the famous. The more people read my next ride report which will be absolutely epic and on my own terms the faster cacks destruction will come to fruition.

Anyway a most rightgeous dude named otto on a triumph bonneville blurted out that he would give $20 for a hunk, SOLD! He axed me where he could cut his hunk from and i said I dont give a rats ass.

with trembling hands he augered a hole into CaCks quivering flanks. Of course the pilot drill in my antique hole saw bored a hole in the coolant resivwore and brown coolant fell out on the ground





so he took his hunk and ran with glee over to his friends

leaving me to figure out how to keep the rest of the brown crap in the bottle.

i consequently rooted around in the tray of a handy lawn implement and found a big ass screw and turned it into the hole waalaa fixed


Then i went haulin ass up over some pass on a soupy dirt road up near 11,000 ft. and then kicked back on I-70 and blasted home at the speed of light

Be still my pretties....



Stay tuned for the "Curiosity Killed the Rat" chapter of the Cack Chronicles. Or as I call it the Angina Monologues

Are those from angina jollies one woman show?

JJ

How much for the can opener? I like the can opener.

I think we all know the swing-a-way is going to make it to the Wee.

I hate the idea of Cacks destruction but I'll pony up $20 for a piece and eagerly await the next installment from Vermin :dllama

So we all can agree that the dual handlebars are genius, right?



not so fast earthlings! I was uncomfortable with the lack of rear view on this rig to begin with. When my arms are up on the apehangers and I am slouched down like Marlon Brando I can't see out my standard mirrors. So I put a ton of mirrors on my mirror trellis.

Well bad knews ratlings, when in a dire traffic situration it is like seeing the world through flies eyes. It only adds confusion and visual pandemonium.
My genius idea keeps getting worst and worst.

Then waalaa at the local flea market I found this for $2



Thassright a 1980 Oldsmobile Toronado Mirror WITH A THERMOMETER THAT IS UNAFFECTED BY DIRECT SUNLIGHT. nO MORE FISHinG around for my hottub thermometer while hauling ass down the road.

Of course in this day and age it is all about control so I mounted the included joystick. Have you ever wondered how those mechanical mirror controls work but couldn't figure it out? Same kind of majic that keeps airplanes up? Well I have seen the guts of one and I ain't tellin

Is there no end to the magic that is ChittyChittyCackCack ?

Go, Verm!

Uhmerikan engine-uity

FUCK YEAH!

JJ

This is possibly the most worrisome RR I have ever read...


AND I LOVE IT!


I can't believe this is for real, your writing is fantastic and I have sent the link to bunches of "A" types that will squirm and then reply as if I am truly crazy!

Keep up the good work! I want more! Totally subscribed

We all know that its done with mirrors and magnets…

Isn't everything?

JJ

the peanut gallery says

Dear ahendepe,

the condition of this bike is a SIN and you my friend are an IDIOT

- elginboy43


Dear ahendepe,

Are you for real? Is this for real?

- electracraft

Dear ahendepe,

Send it to Manila P.I., it will blend in nicely there with the jeepnies!

- mauigeorge

Dear ahendepe,

I have a PC too, and I baby it.... if anyone ever doubts how tough the PC engine is they can read the story of this bike.

poor poor PC. no bike deserves that treatment

seriously...
you should abandon it at the National Motorcycle Museum in Anamosa, Iowa

- the_lorax_3





Dear ahendepe,

Does it come with any bungy cords?

- merfs426

Starting to Tear up in Pagosa

Think you need to try and convince Cal, that his BMW needs a few cack style modifications to fit in when you go riding. He is my father-in-law.

I have seen Cal in action and, while being an excellent scooter pilot while rolling down the road, his short legs will Cack (verb) that bike up just fine in low speed adventures in parking lots. As you already know he is good company around a campfire and a credit to beat up motorcycles everywhere.

Cal has more gross tonnage on his bike than even I do when loaded up for trips.


Vermin