The Road to Ruin; er, Deadhorse

Discussion in 'Ride Reports - Epic Rides' started by FlyingPenguin, Aug 29, 2012.

  1. FlyingPenguin

    FlyingPenguin Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2004
    Oddometer:
    298
    Location:
    Big Sky
    The story begins in August of 2011. Donny wakes up one morning and while flossing his teeth he realized that he was going to turn 60 and had yet to ride a motorcycle to Alaska. Sort of delayed mid-life crisis meets bucket list. Not that he had led a sedentary life. In the 70's and 80's he rode AMA Pro Flattrack and Roadrace. Rumor has it that he even knocked Kenny Roberts down in a half mile tho he swears that the King ran into him and tried to defy the Laws of Physics. A month or so later we're bench racing at an AHRMA vintage MX when he confides in me his yearning to travel north. Being the good friend that I am, I promptly offer to accompany him. Soon our party has swollen to a total of 4 with the addition of Dougie and Denny and we have a departure date set for Aug 12. To some that may seem late in the season, but we all race Vintage MX and that was the only window in the race schedule.

    A pic to keep up your interest....somewhere on the road to McCarthy-
    [​IMG]



    The ensuing winter months are taken up with, well nothing of any real importance to the trip. After all, the trip is still months away and we all realize that trip planning is highly over-rated. Then in mid June, Dougie suffers a stroke. At least he claims he had a stroke. I am fairly certain that his 5 a day Viagra habit finally caught up with him. However within minutes of posting an ad on Match.com we have replaced him with Roy. Roy comes with a few liabilities- he lives in Texas and he rides and V-Strom. However his lack of physical fitness provides the rest of us with at least a semblance of security. Now we don't have to run faster than the bear, we just have to run faster than Roy.

    My original plan was to ride my GS1000, but when a nicely farkled 950 appeared for sale in a town nearby for a good price, Well, I went over to the Orange Side. The PO had done a nice job- Touratech panniers, tank bag and skid plate, Wings exhaust, Euro HID headlight, and Superplush suspension. I ran up a couple of thousand miles during the early summer. Enough to finish burning off the Pirelli's and the old chain. New Super Enduros from Twisted Throttle and a new DID X ring chain from my local shop along with a new Seat Concepts foam and cover from the Flea Market and an oil change I'm ready to go.

    New Mefo compared to tired Scorpion-
    [​IMG]

    Shiny new seat-
    [​IMG]
    Coming up next: Riding north thru Mordor
    #1
  2. dave6253

    dave6253 GCBAR Explorer

    Joined:
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    :lurk I really wanted to ride out to McCarthy, but didn't have the time. This sounds like it may get fun. I'll hang around.
    #2
  3. MrKiwi

    MrKiwi Long timer Super Supporter

    Joined:
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    New Zealand
    I'm in :thumbup
    #3
  4. hooligan

    hooligan Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2003
    Oddometer:
    178
    Location:
    NE Georgia
    Planning on the same thing in a couple of years so this will be interesting.

    Let's go.
    #4
  5. Mike_drz

    Mike_drz Banned

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2012
    Oddometer:
    401
    Location:
    somewhere near the beach
    sounds very interesting :D
    #5
  6. Bullspit

    Bullspit Adventurer

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2012
    Oddometer:
    48
    Location:
    Splitting Lanes Between MI and CA
    A bunch of, "well seasoned" riders.

    Trip planning "overrated".

    A V-Strom ridden by a Texan.

    Bears.

    What could go wrong?

    I don't want to miss this one!
    #6
  7. Fire44

    Fire44 Old, Slow and Tired

    Joined:
    May 25, 2010
    Oddometer:
    1,042
    Location:
    Middle of Delaware (aka Nowhere)
    I feel like Donny.....but I'm not 60 (pushing 50). I keep hearing the great north calling me, but being in Delaware it is a LONG ride just to get close. Someday.

    Subscribed and can't wait to read you ride report!!!!
    #7
  8. FlyingPenguin

    FlyingPenguin Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2004
    Oddometer:
    298
    Location:
    Big Sky
    Donny lives near Seattle so we voted his house as the jumping off point for our pilgrimage northward. Denny lives in the middle of the Sacramento valley in Kalifornia. The week leading up to the weekend of Aug 9 was extremely hot in Kalifornia and Nevada. On Saturday the 9th at Casa de Denny the daytime temps hit 107 and even at nite the temps weren't dropping below 90F, so he took the easy way out and loaded his GS800 in the back of his truck, riding the slab of I-5 in air conditioned comfort. While he waslistening to his old BeeGee's 8 tracks, Roy was slogging across the Great Basin sucking his Camelback dry hourly unknowingly enroute to a minor rendevous with destiny in the backwaters of Oregon.

    Meanwhile, I was kicking back at Lake Tahoe checking out the Wooden Boat Show:

    [​IMG]


    By early evening it had cooled off to the high 90's in Reno, so at 7:00 I was headed up Hwy89 north out of Truckee. A nice 2 lane mountain road for 25 miles, it dumps out into the Sierra Valley where I headed east on 49 through the hay fields and cattle ranches. The temp through the valley was running in the 80's but by the time I hit 395 it was back to the mid 90's. Ominously, there was a large black cloud hanging over the north end of Honey Lake near Susanville. Seems there was a fire burning off to the northwest and the winds were carrying the smoke plume right at ground level across my path. My speed towards Susanville coincided perfectly with the setting sun and as darkness descended I dove into the wall of smoke. The moon was only a dim sliver and the darkness was totally black. For the next hour and half all I could see was a tunnel burned into the smoke with my HID headlite and the lines of reflectors vanishing at a point on the horizon. The temps stayed in the 80's and while not as thick as the north end of a south bound Villiers, the smoke was downright unpleasant. Occasionally a mouse or rabbit would dart across my path, and one very lucky skunk that stopped just short as I went past at 75. All that was missing was a red glow on the horizon and small humanoids with hairy feet.

    The Alturas Super 8 was a welcome sight and I was checking in at 9.40 I noticed the hamburger stand across the street was still open. Cool! I could use a nice chocolate frosty cone. I dropped my coat and helmet in the room and headed across the 4 lane street. Only to find that the employees decided that the 10 pm closing time posted on the window didn't apply to them. Little did I know that this was going to set the tone for many ensuing ice cream and coffee stops.

    Late Sunday afternoon I stopped in at the Farm in Chehalis, Washington. It felt strange to be there without a mx and trials bike, but at least I got to watch a couple of the late motos.
    [​IMG]


    Coming up next- How a VStrom is related to a manure spreader.
    #8
  9. hooligan

    hooligan Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2003
    Oddometer:
    178
    Location:
    NE Georgia
    What happened?
    #9
  10. TurboBonefish

    TurboBonefish Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2003
    Oddometer:
    231
    Location:
    Melbourne FL /Laguna Niguel CA
    Well:freaky Hooligan sucks me in :clap Then :cry So is this like the first one is free:bmwrider
    #10
  11. charles353

    charles353 Pretentious Asshat

    Joined:
    May 25, 2011
    Oddometer:
    18
    Location:
    Flagstaff, AZ
    Must have more report.:dhorse
    #11
  12. FlyingPenguin

    FlyingPenguin Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2004
    Oddometer:
    298
    Location:
    Big Sky
    Sorry about the delayed posting. Trying to write a ride report while on the ride just didn't work too well. Especially when all of the smoke escaped from my laptop charger. But now that I'm relaxing on the deck of a condo in Big Sky, Mt. I'll be catching up.

    A brief introduction to our merry band of pranksters:

    Denny, retired at an early age and entered the Federal Witness Protection Program. After relocating to Kalifornia, he was noticed by a Hollywood producer and soon found full time work as a stunt double for Ron Jeremy. Whenever the script calls for the Hedgehog to fall out of a window or get hit by a truck, they bring in Denny. If you recognize Denny, please don't tell the Basque mob. Denny is astride a GS 800.
    [​IMG]


    Roy, the Texan works full time for a major motorcycle aftermarket company and works part time as a model for socks, gloves and balaclavas. His cell phone has been medically attached to his hand so he can't lose it. Roy rides V Strom #2.
    [​IMG]


    Donnie, the bane of the King, you've already met. Donny rides V Strom #1 and spent the entire winter cross referencing the Milepost and committing it to memory. Don't mind the red eyes, he really isn't much of a morning person:
    [​IMG]


    And then there is yours truly. Not much else to say:
    [​IMG]



    On the afternoon of Aug 10 Roy tied a yellow ribbon on the oak tree in his neighbors yard, kissed his wives goodbye, pointed his meticulously prepped V Strom to the NW and put his head down. Thirty seconds later, after turning on his fuel, he was on his way, again. By late Sunday afternoon he was in beautiful downtown Baker, Oregon. He filled his tank, scraped a few pounds of insects from his headlight, flipped down his face shield, hit the starter button.... and nothing. Not a click, a clack or even a tired moan and puff of smoke. The VS is dead in the water, or at least dead at the fuel island. The good news is that after a few short hours Roy has determined that the starter, charging system and wiring are fine and the problem is the battery is toast. The bad news is it is now 7pm on Sunday nite in Baker, Oregon and nothing is open. The good news is the farm supply shop opens up promptly at 8am the next morning. The bad news is they don't stock new batteries. The good news is that a little known division of Suzuki experimented with building farm equipment in the '60s so by 8.30 Roy is flashing across Eastern Oregon with a donated battery from a Suzuki manure spreader. During a quick stop at his parents house he recreates a scene from his college days, "Hi Mom, hi Dad. What's for dinner, can you do my laundry. Thanks, gotta go", and by midnight Monday Roy was on the couch at Casa de Donnie. Since Denny and I arrived first we got the guest beds.
    By mid morning Tuesday we've crossed into Canadia are we're heading north up Vancouver Island. Pretty much a boring run up the slab until Campbell River where we turn inland towards Gold River and our first overnite of the trip.

    Strathcona Provincial park:
    [​IMG]

    North of Gold River we encounter some local traffic:
    [​IMG]

    The logging trucks weren't any problem. However a cager purposely ran Donnie right into the ditch. No damage except a broken Givi windshield. So to the driver of a black Dodge dualie, license tag BV 1055, I hope 2 squirrels run up you pants leg and say, "Lets eat one now and take the other one for later".
    [​IMG]
    <small><a href="https://maps.google.com/maps?f=d&source=embed&saddr=12572+Prosser+Dam+Rd,+Truckee,+CA+96161&daddr=42.18232,-120.34589+to:44.01407,-121.31954+to:48.41888,-123.36572+to:49.783312,-126.042295+to:50.67736,-127.40242+to:59.93818,-129.09391+to<img src=" http:="" d26ya5yqg8yyvs.cloudfront.net="" icon10.gif"="" border="0" alt="" title="Grin" smilieid="106" class="inlineimg"></small>
    #12
  13. Mike_drz

    Mike_drz Banned

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    Oddometer:
    401
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    somewhere near the beach
    surely a rider in oregon must got balls :rofl
    #13
  14. calimusjohn

    calimusjohn Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2011
    Oddometer:
    255
    Location:
    Sprague River, OR & Salome, AZ
    Hi. I left south/Central Oregon on August 3rd. Headed up Hwy.97 to Dawson Creek and then the usual route through Dawson City, Top of the World Hwy. Fairbanks, north To Coldfoot. rode south to Anchorage, down and back to Homer skipped over to the Cassier, Jasper and then Missoula, MT. and back to home base.
    I was the old geezer (73) on the very overloaded Vstrom. We had to have passed each other somewhere along the route. 8,084 miles in 24 days. Nice ride.
    #14
  15. hooligan

    hooligan Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2003
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    178
    Location:
    NE Georgia
    You still relaxing on the deck in Montana?:1drink
    #15
  16. TurkeyChicken

    TurkeyChicken Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2011
    Oddometer:
    187
    Location:
    Santa Fe, NM
    Sounds pretty exciting. I'm awaiting more posts about your travels!
    #16
  17. 2Big2Ride

    2Big2Ride n00b

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2009
    Oddometer:
    2
    Location:
    d/FW & wishing it was PNW
    Hey Penguin74Q, aren't you a little over do with your story telling? Lets hear more about your travels, I'm guessing you have plenty of time for writing.

    ...and keep off that rear brake, it is nothing but trouble.
    #17
  18. FlyingPenguin

    FlyingPenguin Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2004
    Oddometer:
    298
    Location:
    Big Sky
    It seems that my laptop picked up some sort of nasty bug while in the Great White North. I knew that I shouldn't have let it spend the night on the countertop next to Roy's Ipad on that lovely night in Wiseman.....

    It was touch and go for quite a while whether my faithful Dell would pull through. The tech to whom I had entrusted its care though was a true wizard- what he was able to do he with nothing more than a chicken leg and eye of newt (and a handful of Benjamins) under a full moon is nothing short of amazing.

    Now that I have it back I will finish up the ride report, right after I back up the remaining pics onto SmuMug that is. Meanwhile, I'm writing a quick ride report on my trip to the Horizons Unlimited Travelers meeting in Cambria last weekend- "To Cambria and Beyond, a Weekend trip in Kalifornia".
    #18
  19. Katoom119

    Katoom119 Mmmm....Orange Kool-aid

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2007
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    1,843
    Location:
    Knoxville, TN
    :lurk
    #19