The Chronicles of a Moe.ron

Chronicles of a Moe.ron​

Background-
Transplanted to SOCAL via Uncle Sam‘s orders a little over a year ago, I packed up the family, motos, trucks, dogs and all our worldly possessions, rented our house and dragged everything across the country.
It’s been good, real good…sure we have had our issues here and there, but overall we are freaking blessed and super stoked (learned that word here in SOCAL)





The riding and weather are world class, the terrain is as varied and interesting as I have seen. This time of year you could surf all morning, eat a fish taco and ride 100 miles of twisty to go skiing in the afternoon…make it back by dusk and you can watch the sun burn out into the ocean…









Shortly, like next day after we arrived in SOCAL we met up with the avatar formally known as Serge A. Storms, but after something happened or didn’t happen or we don’t know or it doesn’t really matter …he is now moe.ron…we immediately clicked. We share a lot of same interest, same insanity, same inflictions and same solutions. He is my opposite in a lot of ways…but I can admire that. He goes through bikes, cars, trucks, guns and jeeps like I go through underwear…one change every month whether they need it or not.

Since I have been out here moe.ron has gone through a Tiger 1050, VolksVagen, Jeep, F800R (told you then you should have bought the F8GS!) and is now on a K13F700GS (a proper ADV bike, as he puts it)….thing is…moe.ron has never ridden any dirt…minus the 1 mile of gravel to get into a campsite once in Ocotillo Wells…his dirt experience is zilch!
Now…he has tasked me or I just took on the responsibility of teaching this moe.ron to ride off road…easy dirt…gravel, dirt, unimproved surfaces…we ain’t talking Erzberg …just a bit off the beaten path, …if it’s off the pavement we will say off road.

What are my qualifications? Not much…owned a dirt bike when I was young, but everyone has owned a dirt bike when young…wasn’t any good on it either…never raced….never even road consistently off road, nothing like decades in a row…hell, I’ve only been back to riding on the street with an occasional dirt foray for the last 6 years, but compared to moe.ron….. I am fucking Graham Jarvis

Is it 20/100 vision leading the blind? Well, yeah…

Maybe that’s where you can help out? We are open to suggestions, advice and some good ole lessons learned, maybe meet up with some of the Dual Sporters of SOCAL…I know you fuckers know how to ride. to be continued soon...

Aw man this is gonna be good! Can't wait to see how it turns out!

I received a bash plate from a generous member here at ADV, it sat in my garage for a month. I finally bolted it on yesterday, good thing too, came in real handy this afternoon! We went out and got the tires dirty for the first time today...

Part 1​

So, moe.ron is riding the 2013 F700GS and me…not about to be outdone…went out and bought a 2013 F800GS…both highly capable with some farkeling of multi-surface travel…way more capable than we (at this moment)

:eek1 :eek1

The ride today begins where every ride begins that involve big poser dirt bikes…Starfucks!




From there it is right up my most favorite paved road in all the land…RT33 from Ojai to Ventucopa. I think this road has been in the last 3 or 4 day trippin reports I put together..it still gives me that warm, fussy feeling when I ride it.

Beautiful sunny day, temps were mild, glad we waited a bit for the sun to heat the roads, sure the early bird gets the worm, but I don’t eat worms and I don’t like ice while riding a motorbike


Mid Screen, you can see a dirt line transversing the slope...that's the Ortega Trail :huh:huh

Stop for some happy snaps and bladder relief…Starfux runs right through ya….$3 to piss it away 20 miles later…:slurp

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Yes!!! We found dirt already…no crawl, walk, run here….right into the squishy, sticky, peanut butter mudbog….this stuff will suck the life blood from the strongest of riders

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OK, not really that bad…but it was slightly entertaining and a quick lesson in throttle control was had.

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Don't know what happen with sound?! but moe.ron's bike does not sound like that!

These tires suck for the dirt.



Here is crazy thinkin...riding on shitty tires off road will make you all that much better when you get some decent knobs

If I survive long enough to buy em :huh


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Apache Canyon Road…training session number 1
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That Touratech "bash plate" was outgunned the moment you pulled out of Starbucks.........:eek1

Nice pix

Oh great?! The usual suspects are here

Better than what he had....oh well, guess you get what you pay for from TT :eek1

Thanks, glad you enjoy em. Stay tuned Next installment coming soon.

I am off to see the wizard...

Part One Continued​

Santa Clause brought moe.ron this video for X-mas…it is great! Good Job Ned

Between watching the DVD, watching some YouTube and reading a bunch on the interwebs I was ready to teach. :huh Was moe.ron ready to receive? :Eek That’s hard to be determined at this time. Now again, I am not Jimmy Lewis or Rawhyde or Cornerspin. I barely get down the trail without destroying myself, but I am an instructor by trade and like I said before I am fucking David Knight compared to this moe.ron right now.


So, we shut down at the beginning of the road to talk about couple things to practice as we get on down the dirt road….
•Eyes up
•Don’t look at what you don’t want to hit, look where you want to go instead
•Position on bike
•Position on pegs
•Hand Grip strength, don’t white knuckle
•2 fingers on clutch
•2 fingers on brake
•Be aware that front brake may lock every now and again
•Elbows up, elbows up
•Squeeze bike with legs
•Let bike move around underneath you
•Stand up…get use to it…sit when terrain permits, but train to stand a lot
•Blah
•Bla
•Blah
•Bla
•Oh and don’t forget to turn off all your whiz bang ASC / ABS


A couple things turned into lots of things…my bad…. This moe.ron was over loaded.
“Tell ya what, you just go down the road. I will take off at my pace sitting down. If you turn off main road, wait for me” he says...sounds like a plan

Fair enough, let him get the feel on his own.

So awaaaaayyy we go!!! I am so amped!! I love to watch folks doing things that I love for their first time….I wonder if he’ll love it like I do?

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Apache Canyon is rolling hills in the beginning, to flat, gentle turns, few water crossings that are dry 9 months out of the year, no real tough stuff, a good place for a leisurely ride.



This is my first time with the F8 off pavement and I have to say, I like it a whole lot!! Coming off a Wee-Strom (which I fucking love till death) to this is night and day in the dirt. I love the Wee, but it can’t touch a F8 off pavement.

At the end of Apache Canyon is Nettle Springs CG, but the local target shooters have turned it into a 360’ fire at will range …a place to bring the shit around your house you don’t want, shoot it and leave the garbage…it’s gotten a lot better from the last time I was here…it was TVs, Toilets, Bowling Pins, Bottles everywhere…. I like to shoot things just like the next guy, but fuck! Come on!! Clean your shit up son!!


Moe.ron leads the way for a bit…anyone want to chime in or PM what he is doing right and what needs improvement based on his technique here? Wise ass comments accepted as well, don’t be shy.

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..guess i should have told him it was a deadend

Tell ya what I saw…good slow comfortable speed, not riding over his head (like me), good line selections, good eyes up…needs improvement on relaxing..get to your happy place moe.ron and breathe…relax…it’s hard to tell in video, but in real time you looked like a dog shitting broken glass…that’s why you were so wore out after only 20 miles of easy dirt roads….and elbows up





​

UpSt8, you had me with your post back east that went something like "look at what my balls did."
Glad to see you getting out out there, and posting the nonsense.

Part one continued again


After what I would consider a successful first exposure to the glory of dirt road riding we were hungry as hostages. Off to Ventucopa,Elevation 2999' Pop:92 for some grub at The Place or Santa Barbara Pistachio Factory.

Guess my memory isn’t what it used to be... pistachio factory hasn’t served sit down meals for years, but it wasn’t a total loss. Moe.ron scored some pistachios and we rapped with a Forest Ranger about getting us some jobs someday. Pay might suck, but damn if they don’t have a nice office to work in. Asked about the road conditions in Cuddle Valley too, I could see from where we were they had snow. I wanted to do Quatal Canyon up into Pine Mountain, but moe.ron was not feeling it. Made the conservative call to avoid mutiny and stayed down low in the valley.



Anyway off to The Place, the chow there is decent, the rootbeer delicious and the ambiance is nice enough.


What? Closed? Shit, didn’t plan on that.



Hey! I know! Let’s hit Reye’s Creek Bar and Grille!



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Only went by there once before to go hiking, but didn’t stop.












WOW!! Cool, cool, cool…..cool.
Atmosphere of out the ying, yang…cast of characters, humorist, and friendly, down home, good ole boys and girls tucked away in this hidden nook. The food was goliath in portions!! We sat right by the kitchen and it was like a parade of food whenever orders came out. Moe.ron and I ooooooo and aaaaahhhhing as each plate passed. Food Porno is what moe.ron called it.





moe.money moe.problems


Stuffed to the gills and with the sun getting close to golden hour we made a run for the mountains. Important to get up and over this time of year…Icy Roads in SOCAL? You bet your ass.







Back through 33…snow in them there hills.

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To “civilization”






Till next time…. hopefully soon…ride fast, take chances.​

I gotta get my marker in!

Gonna go back and look at the videos - and W O R D S!!! Lotsa words to read! :eek1

oser

Yep, I gotta start working out or something! I will be the first to admit that 20 miles of dirt wore me out, my legs are sore as hell today! Its only going to get better.

That 14LB turkey sandwich I had for lunch didn't help either, sure was friggin' good though. I was pretty pissed The Place was closed! No more leaving the house without breakfast or at least throwing something in the tail bag.

BUT, I follow the turn signals, I have faith Sensei will not purposely try to kill me, yet...