"The Twisted Arm Tour" brought to you by co-conspirators Ballistic Ken and Merickk

“Terri, where’s the BMW shop? I’m meeting Ken there.” Merickk, the country boy whose preferred navigational system resembles literally using the rule of thumb – wet your thumb stick it out in the air to figure out which way the wind blows – wasn’t going to find that shop in the big ugly city of Albuquerque without a little direction.

So I grabbed my wallet, shoved my tootsies into my street boots, grabbed my jacket and helmet and decided to show him how to get there.

“Devon, I’ll take you as far as the shop, but then I’m turning around and going home to take a nap, okay?” Those words came back to taunt me time and time again all weekend long.

What should have been a quick run to the local BMW shop, followed by a nap and girly time at the pedicurist and with my hair stylist turned into an almost 600 mile adventure complete with time with friends, a ticket, a tumble, and a little bit of trouble when the weekend was all said and done. I lay the blame squarely at the booted feet of Ballistic Ken and Merickk. They are solely responsible for all the fun I had....and no, I never did get that pedicure, nap or my hair done.

Ya know, I don't recall twisting that arm very much at all.



Here I have a gun pointed at them, can't ya tell?

An XT, KLX and a GS...........What could go wrong?

Remember that bad things happen in threes.

True dat!

btw, I'm finally untwisted enough to have the clarity and soundness of mind to write this damn thing.

And I'm here to keep the facts straight, in case you slip into "Reckless Exaggeration" mode.

yeah, uh huh, you do that! Trash pick-up around my 'hood is on Mondays, so I'll be carrying your sack of lies to the curb, my darlin'





shhh, seriously though, Ken is a real sweetie-pie

Merickk is from the Aztec/Farmington area and I live in Albuquerque. He wanted to meet a local inmate and join myself and a few others in Santa Fe for Dranrab Luap and Badge 320’s stop-over at GrizGirl’s place. The original plan was for Merickk to ride up to Santa Fe after meeting Ballistic Ken in Albuquerque taking a mostly dirt route through the Sandia Mountains, then through the Pueblos and up La Bajada Hill for the meet-up in Santa Fe. My plan was to spend Saturday pampering myself and getting all girly-made up for dinner in Santa Fe. I don’t get out much and besides, I was meeting Luap and Badge! What hotties! What girl wouldn’t want to look her prettiest?

They were on these..............

I was on this..............

Just to back up for a minute….my bike was getting worked on in Gallup and Merickk offered to ride with me back to Albuquerque last Friday evening the 10th, after I picked up my bike. I was grateful for the company and to be with another rider instead of riding back alone at night. We met at the moto shop in Gallup. I was very late getting there, just in the nick of time before they closed. Once there, I paid the bill, suited up, and scarfed down a chicken sandwich as quickly as possible. Merickk apparently had been waiting all day for me (he got out of work early from his assignment in Gallup.)

He finished his cigarette while I fumbled with my gear. I asked Merickk, “Do you want to take the long way to Albuquerque, the very long, long way back to Albuquerque or the super-long, very long way back?” Any route to Albuquerque was going to be a long one due to the fact that I have a small bike that can’t go the distance at interstate highway speeds of 75 mph, therefore, we’d be taking an alternate route that adds hours and miles to an otherwise quick 2 hour, 140 mile trip by interstate.

The super-long, very long way entailed a ride south past Zuni, and east past Datil, Pie Town and other locales in the mountains eventually coming out at Socorro, a short 12 miles of I-25 and roads along the Bosque and through Los Lunas, Belen and back to Albuquerque. I wasn’t very keen on that route because of the mountains late at night and the elk or deer I feared would be dancing with us on the roads. The long, but shorter way, to Albuquerque meant riding on Rt. 66 which was completely unappetizing to a dirt lover like Merickk. Rt. 66 shadows the interstate most of the way, with a few scenic departures and a couple of sketchy entrances on to I-40 (undesirable on a wee XT 225 that screams when I push her past 65mph). It was going to be dark soon and we wouldn’t see much in the way of scenery, anyway.

This is where the arm twisting began.

Honestly, I just wanted to ride as quickly and painlessly as possible back to Albuquerque. I leaned toward the Rt. 66 option and be done with it. However, Merickk had his sights on the eastern Navajo route, which was the very long, long way back. Well, alrighty then!

We rode through a very desolate part of the eastern Navajo Reservation (I’m from the western Navajo Nation) with few Navajo communities under the new moon. There wasn’t going to be much in the way of dirt, because number one, I’m skittish on dirt roads I don’t know, two, we’d be riding in the dark, and lastly, most of the roads across the eastern portion of the reservation are now paved. We did hit a stretch of gravel road between Church Rock and Smith Lake, but lamentfully, it was not enough to quench Merickk’s thirst.

We made a couple of pit stops on our ride, but nothing too eventful (except when I couldn’t find my way out of the housing area in Crownpoint). But at about 10:30 pm, we pulled our bikes over near one of the entrances to Chaco Canyon. We shut off the ignitions and it took a moment to readjust to total darkness. It was black as pitch and not a soul in sight. There were no homes or signs of community anywhere. Nature called Merickk’s number, which is why we stopped in the middle of nowhere. While he did his business, I looked up at the sky and the most brilliant array of stars covered the night sky. It was so beautiful! It’s been years that I’ve seen something as dazzling as that blanket of celestial wonder.

The image of the night sky is etched in my memory now. I'm kinda glad I got my arm twisted.

We rode on for a few more hours passing Torreon, then on to Cuba. I was overcome with fatigue and cold and we made a couple stops along the way. You’d think the cold would keep me alert, but I was getting very sleepy! Then it was south to Bernalillo and finally the west side of Albuquerque. We rolled into my place at close to 1:30 am Saturday last. I was looking forward to a leisurely sleep-in on a Saturday morning……

He and I had just finished a 240 mile trip that took us about 6 hours through desolate roads across the eastern Navajo Reservation. I was tired. Tired in the sense that I had just finished a long work week and getting in an hour or so extra would’ve recharged this Energizer bunny. When he and I rolled into Albuquerque, he crashed at my place instead of another inmate’s house because it was so darn late.

I had bought a couple small bottles of pre-mixed margaritas which we drank on my patio once we got in. While I was tired, it seemed Devon (Merickk) was still wound up and could go on a few more hours. He was full of chatter. You know, come to think of it, I’ve never actually observed Devon going to bed or sleeping and I have had FIVE occasions this summer to sleep within spittin'-n-slappin' distance of him.

I pride myself on my hostess skills and manners but this time, I had to get to bed. I was made even more tired by checking email right before bed and I received sad news from a friend in England so I spent close to another hour on the horn speaking with him. At this point it was nearing 3:30 am.

I finally got to sleep but was awakened by Devon’s banging around in my kitchen. He couldn’t figure out how to use my grinder and coffee pot. I made coffee and breakfast, we looked at routes on my computer, he talked to Ken and Gordy (the inmate he was supposed to stay with) and we talked more about our plans for the day. I was resolute in my decision to get prettified and drive my vehicle to Santa Fe to meet the Blue Line Tour Hotties.

“Ah, come on, ride to Santa Fe!” Merickk started in on the arm twist.

“But I wanna get my feet done and my hair fixed up!” I protested. “I can’t ride, it’ll mess up my hair!” Oh, my God, did I really say that? Eeeek, I really am a girl!

Not only was I going to do the day of beauty before dinner in Santa Fe that night, but I was taking a nap, dammit! I tried to stand my ground but Merickk was having none of it.

As I mentioned in the first post, Devon had a short chat with Ballistic Ken and it was decided he would meet Ken at the local BMW shop. But I couldn’t let Country Boy wander the mean streets of Albuquerque like a lost puppy, so I led him to the shop. Then, it was nap-nap for Cookie! NOT!

oh and btw...

oh, patience, my love. you will be richly rewarded. They got me very dirty and I even slept with them....and there's blackmail pics which I'm sure will make their way here. First, I gotta get ahead a little in the storytelling to make it all blend together like a smooth daiquiri.

We met Ken at Sandia BMW. He and I had met about 1 ½ years ago when he came to the city for his birthday with his girlfriend Emily and to catch a show at Santa Ana Star. Ken’s a big guy with a bear handshake and hug, my kind of person I like to hang out with.

We bullshitted a few minutes outside the shop and then I asserted (tried to) myself, “Ok, fellas, I’ll meet you up at Santa Fe this evening.”

Ken started in now, with his arm twist, “Hey, should we get a bite to eat?”

Ok, on this part, I’m not sure how we got to this place, but it turned into, “Aw, come with us to PJ’s, it’s Demo Day.” I’d heard that they were supposed to have snacks and such so I chimed in with that. Alrighty, may as well get a little something to eat, right? And maybe test ride a Triumph? I can get my nap and nails done later, right?

So onwards we went. I led the way across the city and we rode into PJ’s. I never did find any food, but we met several other inmates there. LoriKTM, GSDave, Gordy and Eurobiker were all there. Eurobiker made me a deal on his R850R. This got Ken thinking about making me a deal on my XT for his girlfriend so I could hand over the cash to Eurobiker for the beemer, but I’m going to have to pass for now. I like my bike too much.

After a bit of visiting and checking out the bikes for demo rides, I bid them farewell, again. “Ok, now I really must get back home.” I pleaded.

“Naw, you’re riding with us to Santa Fe, arnt’cha?” no smoother words Ken spoke to Barbie.

It was make or break time for Devon and Ken. Will they be able to break Cookie’s resolve? Get Cookie to ride to Santa Fe or tease her mercilessly about her wussiness for driving her car, wearing makeup and getting her hair done.

Ken played the wild card, “If you ride to Santa Fe, I’ll get a room so’s you can take a nap before dinner tonight.” Hmmm, tempting.

I wasn’t really that tired anymore. It was more the free time to do the girly stuff I wanted. But with a half-twisted arm I said “Ok.”

Now, remember I left my place with little more than the gear on my back, and my wallet. As I rode I thought about the ride back to Albuquerque that night after dinner. Yikes! It would be dark on Hwy. 14, potential for deer on the road, and freezing cold without enough gear. Ken and Merickk were planning to share a hotel room for the night and they invited me to bunk with them, so problem solved.

So long as I got home early enough on Sunday, I thought, it’ll be alright. I made plans to work in my classroom as many hours as I could on Sunday. If I made it back to Albuquerque by 10 am Sunday, I’d have most of the morning and afternoon to work. I shared my work plans with Ken and Devon and they looked at me like I was insane…work? On a Sunday?

On the way to Santa Fe, we stopped at the Greenside Café, at Cedar Crest in the Sandia Mountains, for lunch. We’d hoped to visit with the proprietor, Jaybob, who is also an ADV inmate but he was out when we stopped by. Ken remarked that he’d always wanted to try the Greenside. Our lunches were delicious. I left a note for Jay at the counter, and then we were off once again.

On part of the ride I daydreamed of a comfy pillow-top hotel bed and a beauty stop at Target to at least pick up a couple of cosmetics and some hairspray. But that would have to wait.

I got completely sidetracked once again. We stopped for a stretch and water at a gas station at the junction of the 599 bypass and Hwy. 14. Ken pulled out his map and said, “We’re thinking of a ride up the mountain to the Santa Fe Ski Area, wanna come with?......”

Great lunch, a scenic ride on the Turquoise Trail and twisties up the mountain in Santa Fe. Sweet! Getting your arm twisted never hurt so good as it did this day.

remember, I left my house with the gear on my back and my wallet. I didn't bring my camera. But Ken's got the pics. I was supposed to return home in about 15 minutes. I didn't foresee returning home 31 hours and a few hundred miles later.

Ya know, I kinda like running away from home for little bits at a time. I grab my mini-adventures whenever, wherever and with whoever I find them.

ok boys and girls, I've got to head off to school. The Gentlewoman from Albuquerque now yields the floor to the Gentleman from Bloomfield or the Gentleman from Farmington.

If ya haven't piped in by the time I get home, I'll put up a little more. More story and pics please, the masses are hungry.

this aint gonna end well

I did manage to find a tiny bit of dirt on this trip.




Not too much though. All this while waiting around for cookie to get to gallup.