Note to self:

[Lee Keller King]

If you disconnect the choke cable in a vain (and unnecessary) attempt to remove the carburators, do not forgot to readjust the choke when you reattach the cable.

Failing to do so will make your mileage and performance suck!


Lee
(If you can't be an example, be a lesson)

[dmack]

If you run out of gas in your truck and decide to use the gas from the bike in the back to partially fill the tank - remember that if you are going to prime the carb with a McDonald's cup of gas while your friend cranks the engine, it will backfire through the carb, causing you to spill the aforementioned McD's cup all over. You will catch the truck engine, hood, your arm, and the freeway shoulder on fire. Hopefully your previously mentioned friend will throw you the fire extinguisher so you can put everything out (yes, you should also put the freeway out before speeding away).

Happened 24 years ago, and I still remember it vividly.

[Gumbeaux]

When crossing a deep stream during a spur of the moment "adventure" ride, remove expensive electronics such as laptop, ipod, camera etc. from your tailbag or tankbag....just in case.

[lurobi]

When changing one of those insertable cylinder oil filters, be sure not to put it in backwards. When you do, don't assume that strange clicking sound can wait another day to fix-- it's probably a scored cylinder. Way to save $15 bucks on an oil change.

[CplRooster]

When drilling multiple holes in the upper floor of the building you're working on, hitting multiple hat channels(a thin metal stud where the edges are slopes at about 45 degrees) with a 3/4 hole saw, check every hole and verify it is hat channel.

After drilling multiple holes, I drilled through many hat channel edges, the last hole I had to drill, thought I'd hit hat channel one more dang time. I fought to keep it going in straight and then "BANG"!!!! I am an electrician and thought immediately that I had hit energized circuits, then suddenly realized that my face seemed to melting from the "flames" that shot out the hole I had just drilled. A mere moment later I realized to my relief, that it was water. Whew...it was only water on my face. WAIT...there IS electrical stuff all around me and WATER is now shooting all around me. THEY DON'T MIX WELL!!! Grabbed a cinder block that happened to sitting there and put it over the hole to keep the water going to the place it would end up eventually, DOWN. Down to the server room that was below me, CRAP, CRAP, CRAP. Ran down stairs to the server room, through the sprinkler pump room. The water was just pouring out of the ceiling into the pump room and missing the server room. Whew...I thought!!! Now the water was collecting on the floor was starting to rise and going into the foyer of the executives area.

I have never since removed the lower part of an exterior door to let the water, this fast. Oh yea...gotta call the boss and get a plumber in route to shut of the water and fix my F up. All while I was sweeping water out the door.

[dfwscotty]

When adjusting the carbs on your VW engine, make sure the engine is nice and warm so when you chop the throttle, you know it idles instead of dying.

Normally not an issue on the road but this was in a friend's homebuilt airplane on short final to landing. Didn't quite make the runway but made a hell of a splash as he hit the lake right before the threshold. He walked away and the plane flew later with no issues after a little more carb tuning!(and draining).

[Chains45]

When installing new jugs on the VW powered dune buggy, understand how the new-fangled "click" torque wrench works.

In other words, do not ignore that subtle little click and keep wrenching on it till you hear/feel that big THUNK as the threads of the aluminum case give it all up... (Why did the dial go to zero?)

Do not do it twice. (hey, I was 18!)

[Kokopelli]

I am in the middle of one now, still learning the lesson. Will get back here once I know what I've learned, if that makes any sense .

[Motoriley]

Now you have us all waiting with anticipation. I hope it's more funny than serious. Good luck!

Originally Posted by Kokopelli

I am in the middle of one now, still learning the lesson. Will get back here once I know what I've learned, if that makes any sense .

[p_s]

I put my Vespa engine back together. It looks exactly like a 2-stroke thumper--vertically split crankcase that takes some violence to coax back together.

I had the right crankcase half in the electric smoker with the seal & bearing inside. I get the engine back together without any trouble. Later I find a bearing in the smoker. I thought my friend who'd been helping was just playing a joke on me and threw it in the trash--after all, the crank rotated very smoothly.

Life intervenes and two weeks later I find massive play in the crank bearings. Turns out that $40 bearing in the smoker that I threw away was not in the engine.

[Drif10]

Originally Posted by KLboxeR

Youch! Then you get to deal with a sunburn when you're done welding in short sleeves

That reminds me of one that happened a couple of months ago:

If you are using a plasma torch, be sure and take your finger off the trigger when you lean against the welding table to adjust the workpiece.........otherwise one's pants zipper might ground against the table while you inadvertantly press the torches trigger resulting in , what I like to call, the "molten yyk zipper against my pubes and holy shit I almost burned my junk off with a plasma torch" dance

You win Chris.

[spqr]

Always check the lug nuts. Especially if you got the work done for free. It can be a tad annoying to have the right rear wheel of your first car come off, while passing a tanker truck, on a mountain road, at 70mph.

Replace the oil filler cap when adding oil to a leaky engine.

Coke can be an effective engine fire suppressant.

LEDs should not be put into wall sockets.

Disconnect the 220 wall heater, and check the capped wires before removing, or you get curly hair.
[IMG]images/icons/eek.gif[/IMG]

And my personal favorite. When burning the garbage at the end of the day with JP8, ensure some one has not filled the clearly marked 'JP8' can with regular gasoline.

It can take weeks for your facial hair to grow back.

[Kokopelli]

Originally Posted by Motoriley

Now you have us all waiting with anticipation. I hope it's more funny than serious. Good luck!

Well, doing a clutch job on an airhead three times to find out that the piston that holds the throughout bearing has a problem is not really funny. I was relieved to find that it probably wasn't my fault after all.

I then decided to change the fork oil. Which is also a pretty straight forward job. As I watched the quite a bit of fork oil shoot (mostly) past my face, I immediately realized that it probably was not a good idea to push the bike of the main stand with the fork caps still off.

I can file this one right next to when I learned that the gearbox will leak oil when you have the input shaft facing up on your work bench and the sump plug incident....

Some years ago I also found out that it's not a good idea to skimp on the fork drain plug washers. They are somehow connected to poor brake performance.

As a self-taught mechanic I can only conclude that my teacher was an idiot.

[EvilClown]

Originally Posted by Kokopelli

...
As a self-taught mechanic I can only conclude that my teacher was an idiot.

Sig line for sure!

[SpitfireTriple]

When you know you've got a slow puncture, be sure you do not park the bike leaning into a slope.