Death

[Mambo Dave]

Originally Posted by exoff-roadgoat

After reading all nine pages I've decided to get the bike out of winter storage and go for a short ride today while the sun is still out.

Atta boy!

No contemplation - just DO

[Pesqueeb]

I've only read the OP so bear with me if this is slightly redundant.

On Feb.27, 2007 I got plowed by a 19 year old bimbo in daddies car while riding my little 125cc scooter to work. Long story short, I suffered what was called "major multiple trauma", and when they wheeled my sorry broken ass into the ER I had no blood pressure/pulse. I was 27. Now, to state the obvious since your reading this, I was revived/survived. Of the parts and pieces I remember, pain and/or suffering, not really a part of it, though it was obviously there given what I remember of my ambulance ride. The actual overwhelming memory and emotion is anger, white hot uncontrolled RAGE to be exact. Even more so than the eventual fear that came when I started having trouble breathing. In those moments, I believe I was fully capable of murder.

Fast forward 5 years, my life has resumed its "normal" path. Great wife, beautiful little girl, job that pays me enough to pay my bills, but not so much that I get in trouble, fairly secure, etc, etc.... Its fair to say that I probably think about "death", as it were, a little differently than most, since I've already done that once. Is the above story the way I would chose to go out again? I would say I'm ambivalent, I don't rightly know that it matters. Dead is dead. If your "fear" of death is the pain factor, I either don't or can't remember any pain. I think it only matters to the people you leave behind, or if your looking to have an open casket funeral. No matter what way you check out, your loved ones will have to experience your passing. For whatever reason some causes of death are viewed as more..... traumatic.....than others, which I now consider silly. In the last 5 years several friends and coworkers have passed, arguably before "their time" (which is something else I now consider silly), and as previously stated, the end result is the same. I think what matters, especially in the cases of terminal illness I've had the displeasure of witnessing the last several years, is how you approach them. Two cases of cancer, one patient (co-worker) became horrifically angry, bitter and mean, the other (my wife's grandma) was charming, caring, and conducted herself with dignity until the very end. She was a class act.

As for the "big question", I went from a pretty sure, though certainly not very active in the Evangelical sense, Christian, to what I would, at best, term an Agnostic. Quite honestly the next hyper-evangelical Doc Dobson Focus On the Family type I run into here in the Springs that tells me God must have a plan for me is going to get punched in the throat. Thats not to say I don't find the Christopher Hitchens Atheist types just as repulsive, because I do, their just a pretty rare breed around here. What I *think*, is that anyone with that much certainty in the unprovable, no matter what breed of Eye-in-the-Sky (or lack thereof), is a crazy person. Ultimately, IMHO the universe is just a crazy chaotic place, and I'm not going to take a side on this one, but I'm not going to rule either out. Am I hedging, is that chickenshit? I don't know, possibly, but I don't think so. I *believe*, that this is all we get. Tell your SO and kids you love them, all the time, don't leave the house, or let them leave without doing so. You might not ever see them again. Go on vacations, have fun, buy some stupidly expensive exotic beer every once in a while, buy good ice cream, give to charity, volunteer at a soup kitchen, call in sick on a Wednesday and go Mountain Biking. Life is short, no matter how long you might live.



*Edit: all that being said, should I not get run over again, cancer is long running in my family, so thats probably how it will end.

[B1]

all great points pesqueeb. personally i give more credence to someone's viewpoint when its been shaped by harsh reality, such as clinical death in your case. i too have issues when people talk of a plan for one's life in that lecturing fundamentalist style, which is pretty easy to do when we generally live in a nice protective coccoon in the western world.

but if someone has done medical or volunteer work in poorer countries, and seen civilians killed in war zones, or countless babies die in famines, i'll be a lot more inclined to listen seriously if they say all of this is part of THE PLAN. i won't necessarily agree, but i'll have a lot more respect for how they have worked out their belief system!

[Terrytori]

Originally Posted by Pesqueeb

I *believe*, that this is all we get. Tell your SO and kids you love them, all the time, don't leave the house, or let them leave without doing so. You might not ever see them again. Go on vacations, have fun, buy some stupidly expensive exotic beer every once in a while, buy good ice cream, give to charity, volunteer at a soup kitchen, call in sick on a Wednesday and go Mountain Biking. Life is short, no matter how long you might live.



.

Life is short for some... and traumatically long for others.

Your first hand encounter with the dark side, has, I am sure, shaped your attitudes dramatically. I think it often works that way for those who have been or are now in a greater proximity to that long goodnight.

Almost five years ago i was diagnosed with cancer. Statistically, 1 out of 4 people with this kind of cancer don't make it to the 5 year mark. I viewed that as playing Russian Roulette with a 4 chamber revolver and there is a shell in one of the chambers.

There is no indication today that i will not be around for another 25 years but i doubt that i will ever imagine that to be true. I pretty much look at every day as if it were one of my last. This does not mean that I have to have a bucket list of unfulfilled dreams. It means that I am simply more awake than i have been at any time of my life to the things that feed my soul... family, friends, and a couple of passions like riding and photography.

As Joni Mitchell wrote:

" Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you've got
'Til it's gone ... "

or in some case... almost gone.

All my best to you Pesqueeb.

[Vicks]

This is a serious reply.

When i was younger, i wanted to die by getting blasted to bits by a grenade, which i pulled the pin off, while flying through the air on my bike, riding off a cliff straight through a un-barricaded corner instead of turning. Seriously, thats how i wanted to die, or so i thought earlier.

Now, i'll take it as it comes. I might be happier dying in my sleep, but i won't wish for it.

[inline4]

People are often at a loss for words, so they say stuff like "God has a plan".

We don't say what we really think.

"He's fukkked"

"Yea, he's really fukked".

[high dangler]

Originally Posted by jacksgp

I've said that when my health turns a corner for the worst, I'm going to start doing again all the things I used to do that I enjoyed so thoroughly when I was younger -- drinking alcohol, smoking tobacco, and hanging around disreputable characters at loud live music venues. Oh, and bacon. Lots of bacon. And hot dogs. And soda. And coffee.... real coffee that keeps you up nights. With pie. Hell yeah.




Winner!

my kinda guy ! Make it something to look forward to.

[Moving Pictures]

Originally Posted by DAKEZ

In my sleep.

The accurate phrase is "In my sleep, like Uncle Chester, not screaming like his passengers."

[FAW3]

Originally Posted by alii1959

The one thing I constantly think of....I don't want to go and leave those I love untold how much I care. I make an annoying habit of telling them often. Further, I constantly let my wife know that, even after 32 years together, that my life has been complete since the day we wed. I have no regrets. I have no real complaints. I cannot understand those who yell, scream, and call names of those they love....especially when those may be the last words they hear from you. Life is far to short, but that doesn't mean it can't be full. Everyday when we lay down at night we are both worn out....trying to stuff as much into each day as possible. That is the way we like it.

I'll 2x alii: I learned something when I was 9 yrs old when my dad went to work one day never came home again - next time I saw him he was in a coffin. Now I'm 57...retired LEO...and for what it's worth...

1: Tell those who you love how you feel and what they mean to you. Belive it or not...it actually will mean as much or more to you than those you tell.

2: Also...few of us get to "pick our day"...we all have something we wish we did or said...so say/do it NOW. I spoke to a co-worker one morning...he was killed early that afternoon...I used to tell trainees that if you look at the LEO memorial in DC remember that each officer listed figured he/she was going home that day...turns out one day they did'nt.

For my 2 kids and my wife I have short letters telling them the above, a recounting of a few shared memories...and what I hope the future brings them. I also have a couple small personal gifts...which I update every few years...the "old gift" is recycled to a birthday or Christmas...and a new gift goes in the special box in our gun safe. Right now for my 17yo daughter a personalized Tiffany bracelet, my 13 yo son...a personalized Puma hunting knife. If the money is short...skip the trinkets...just do the letter/note.

When the day comes (and it is)...even if I did'nt get to say it that day...they can read it and have a small token of my love.

3: Finally...live a life worth living. What are you waiting for? This is the real deal...not a practice run. When this ride is over...it's over.

[Hukamosh]

Sorry if this has already been posted but I didn't read through the whole thread...But, a non violent death by 100 vestal virgins! I should live a good long time as Good Luck finding 'em in this day & age heeheehee.
Seriously though, in my sleep. I don't like pain.

[Dire Wolf]

Originally Posted by lethe

I'll die from injuries sustained after defeating King Kong, Godzilla and Chuck Norris in unarmed combat.

Yeah, right. King King and Godzilla, sure, but Chuck Norris? No way. Obviously you have no idea who Chuck Norris is.

[TrashCan]

This pretty well sums me up.



The proverbial curiosity doesn't usually kill cats. The inquisitive feline has a knack of dodging death by a whisker. Cats are intrepid explorers and fearless acrobats. After all, a creature with nine lives can afford to take risks. According to Brewer's Dictionary Of Phrase & Fable, a cat is said to have nine lives because it is "more tenacious of life than many animals."



I have used up a few that others in the same situation did not make it through.


Such is life, such is death.

[acesandeights]

Originally Posted by Skippii

It's something everyone gets to choose. Sometimes, that means also deciding on a specific time. Most choose not to make that choice. Current laws on euthanasia make it illegal to wait until you need it to do it. This will give us people making those choices you asked about even sooner than before.

Many other people choose how they will die. Alcohol and tobacco use are choices. So is enlisting for military duty. Choosing to give your life for your country or your beliefs might seem take more active cognition than drug use, but you're equally conscious of the decision you've made.

I may be misreading your comment, but it's legal in Oregon (with conditions), the right to Die with Dignity, and upheld by the US Supreme Court.

[Ponies ate my Bagel]

Wow deep thread...

I have two ways I'd like to die.

1. In bed with a few women and have a heart attack.

2. On a race bike running as hard and as fast as I can on the street.

As I'm only 24 I hope neither comes soon. Number 1 can happen minus the heart attack though....

[zrxmoto]

Originally Posted by Pesqueeb

Tell your SO and kids you love them, all the time, don't leave the house, or let them leave without doing so. You might not ever see them again.

I definitely understand what you are saying here, but I guess I approach it differently. I was involved in a head-on highway collision way back in college. Several weeks in the hospital. Many months of rehab. Came close to needing my right leg amputated. If I had not been wearing a seatbelt I most surely would've died.

On top this my mother committed suicide at age 36 when I was a junior in high school. My dad died of cancer at age 56. I had an uncle who was successfully recovering from being a lifelong alcoholic - he was killed by drunk kid who blew thru a stop sign.

Despite my experiences with "death" I guess I don't have what I would call a "fatalistic" outlook on life. Some might expect that I would be somebody who would say, "Live every day as if it were your last." "Come here kids and give Dad a big hug. I'm riding the motorcycle/bicycle into work today and might not make it back."

I prefer to believe that every day I step out the front door I'm going to make it back safe and sound. What makes life worth living is not that it could come to an end tomorrow. I live life for the enjoyment of life not the expectation of death.

I dunno if that makes any sense. I guess it is just how I think about it. I don't go hug my wife or kids because I worry it might be the last time. I hug them because at that moment in time ... I can.