ADVrider

Go Back   ADVrider > Riding > Ride reports
User Name
Password
Register Inmates Photos Site Rules Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 09-23-2013, 07:13 AM   #331
Bultaco206
Back-to-back motos suck
 
Bultaco206's Avatar
 
Joined: Feb 2007
Location: Mineral Point, WI
Oddometer: 1,552
When he gets thrown out and comes to live on your couch he can bring that pic with him.
__________________
'07 DL650, '06 DR650, '06 KLX351, '97 DR350, '83 XR350R (vintage GP racer), '74 Bultaco Alpina (trials)
Bultaco206 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 09-23-2013, 10:45 AM   #332
Hondarider OP
Hero of the Stupid
 
Hondarider's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Adams, MA
Oddometer: 613
Right pannier bulging and bike unbalanced from all of my Mount Rushmore tchotchke, we set off east in search of our next destination. I set the GPS for HOME, expecting that it would find the most direct route to I-90 and all points east, but it went haywire and sent us on a wild chase. First, we went back the way we came and the lady inside the GPS insisted that we turn right onto a hiking trail...she said TURN RIGHT IN 50 FEET...TURN RIGHT NOW...TURN!...DO IT!...DO IT NOW!...TURN DAMN IT! I resisted the urge to see how Mike would fare on dirt singletrack and pulled over while she recalculated. Now she had us make a u-turn and head back towards Rushmore...Mike looking at me with the head tilt of a dog watching television. We went back up the road a couple tenths of a mile and were directed to turn once again...this time there was no road, path , or anything...just forest and rocks and a firm recommendation that I drive directly into them. I stopped again while Mike sat patiently on his bike. I rebooted the GPS and entered HOME all over again. One more u-turn and now it seemed like things might be working...we were still going 180 degrees from the direction I felt we should be traveling, but we went right past the dirt path this time so I weas cautiously optimistic. A mile or 2 later and the lady once again beckoned me to turn right..this time into the entrance for the Mount Rushmore KOA campground.

Just as Mike was starting to question my qualifications for leading this little expedition, I spied the Ponderosa Restaurant on the premises of the KOA and pretended that had been our destination all along. Mike probably could have called my bluff, but he opted to go along with the blatant lie and we went inside for what must have been the 15th chicken-fried steak of the trip. Hmmmmmmmmmmm.

We sat at our table and strategized over our next point of interest. Wall Drug.
Hondarider is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-23-2013, 11:26 AM   #333
Hondarider OP
Hero of the Stupid
 
Hondarider's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Adams, MA
Oddometer: 613
In The Lost Continent, Bill Bryson wrote this of Wall Drug..."It's an awful place, one of the world's worst tourist traps, but I loved it and I won't have a word said against it."

It's an accurate depiction and, for me, an accurate sentiment. Wall Drug is in the middle of nowhere...a pharmacy purchased by a guy named Ted Hustead in the early 30s. Apparently business was slow until Ted's wife came up with the idea of offering free ice water to parched travelers making their way across South Dakota. From there, the business model seems to have morphed into some sort of cowboy-themed bazaar for every kind of trinket, knick-knack, bauble, and gew-gaw. There's an 80' dinosaur - I don't know why...a chapel...an art gallery...cigar store Indians...restaurants...t-shirt stores...Native American jewelry...swords...knives...leather...bull whips...and things that I'm not even creative enough to invent. It's a $hit show my firends.

However, the thing that makes Wall Drug a mandatory stop for me whenever I travel across SD is the advertising campaign. Wall Drug spends nearly half a million dollars every year on 600+ miles of roadside signs that, if you ever have the great pleasure of driving I-90 end to end, I promise will entertain you. They're mostly ridiculous, but they do have a decidedly patriotic feel to them and I can't help but get a little misty whenever I see "FREE COFFEE FOR VIETNAM VETERANS" I know it's a marketing ploy...a minute gesture...but it makes me feel good and that's enough to get me to stop and spring for a bumper sticker and a cold drink.

The signs are really the draw for me and I find myself ticking off mile after mile on I-90 just waiting to see what the next sign says. Apparently I'm not the only one who enjoys them either....Wall Drug has a cult-like following all over the planet. I've seen soldiers in Korea, Iraq, and Afghanistan with signs showing the distances to Wall Drug, SD...road markers in Alaska, Hawaii, and Europe with distances and directions...even scientists on the North and South poles measuring the distances to this little slice of Americana.

Sure, it's cheesy, but it feels so good...just roll with it. Buy a bumper sticker for a nickel and put it on your Volvo in Boston.









Hondarider is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-23-2013, 11:49 AM   #334
Hondarider OP
Hero of the Stupid
 
Hondarider's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Adams, MA
Oddometer: 613
I'm a sucker for these...





Hondarider is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-23-2013, 11:52 AM   #335
Hondarider OP
Hero of the Stupid
 
Hondarider's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Adams, MA
Oddometer: 613
FREE ICE WATER





Hondarider is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-23-2013, 12:29 PM   #336
Hondarider OP
Hero of the Stupid
 
Hondarider's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Adams, MA
Oddometer: 613
Refreshed from her nap, the lady inside my GPS seemed to have her head on straight after lunch. We pulled out of the Ponderosa without ever having met up with Ben or Adam Cartwright and pointed our steeds east. It's worth noting that I found myself jealous of the folks at the KOA and their really high end toys...we saw giant diesel pushers with car haulers and tricked out golf carts and UTVs and ATVs and all sorts of shiny things...I momentarilly questioned my choice of travel...perhaps I'd be happier in a 45' bus with marble floors, a water bed, and more expanding sliders than an ISO shelter. I put that thought behind me as I leaned into the first corner and rolled on the throttle as I exited.

We were on I-90 in short order...I don't even remember the road to get there...I suppose we skirted Rapid City, but I have no recollection. We got out onto 90 at around 4PM and the sun was at our backs...the road was empty and the air was warm...we immediately spied our first Wall Drug sign. It was a good thing too as I had really built up the story over our meal at the Ponderosa and I wanted MIke to get the full Wall Drug experience. Understandably, he had never heard of the place.

We drove on and the signs kept coming...mile after mile...counting down the mileage as we closed in on our destination. I wish they had signs like this on the way out...

"DENVER 1563 miles - TRY THE 3.2 BEER"

"DENVER 1555 miles - VISIT THE MINT"

"DENVER 1412 miles - CATCH YOURSELF A HOOKER ON COLFAX"

"DENVER 1387 miles - FREE LUCKY HORSESHOE WHEN YOU TOUR THE PURINA FACTORY"

It sure would make the trip more interesting.

Hondarider screwed with this post 09-24-2013 at 03:56 AM
Hondarider is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-23-2013, 06:11 PM   #337
Wdwrkr
Beastly Adventurer
 
Wdwrkr's Avatar
 
Joined: Dec 2011
Location: Lost at sea
Oddometer: 1,655
Was wondering where you went. Welcome back
__________________
My mind is the most dangerous neighborhood I ever enter
Wdwrkr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-2013, 01:54 PM   #338
Hondarider OP
Hero of the Stupid
 
Hondarider's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Adams, MA
Oddometer: 613
An hour later and we were exiting I-90 to kneel before the alter of excess and submit ourselves to the force of nature that is Wall Drug...




...mostly I just wanted a Mountain Dew and a bumper sticker
Hondarider is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-2013, 02:16 PM   #339
Hondarider OP
Hero of the Stupid
 
Hondarider's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Adams, MA
Oddometer: 613
We found parking right out front and, being the nerdy engineers we are, we devised a strategy to start at the very end of the strip and systematically hit every shop on both sides of the street in a logical progression. Honestly, I'm not much of a shopper and I lost interest pretty quick. I found a soda cooler and a fist full of cheesy stickers for my bike and I was ready to hit the road. Mike, however, was on the trail of the world's cheapest souvenir t-shirt. We hit every shop...some of them twice...he was chatting up the sales ladies...asking about the availability of more sizes out back...perusing the belt buckles, trucker hats, and turquoise bolo ties...bartering...haggling...bargaining...it was as if we had just found ourselves in some third world street fair...he was in the zone. I think this must have gone on for an hour or more. I wandered around on the sidewalk and did some people watching while he employed all of his negotiation skills to secure a surplus Sturgis 2012 t-shirt in XL for $3. I hit the indoor mall area, visited the travelers' chapel to pray for sunny weather, and sought out a giant jackalope to have my picture taken. Unfortunately, that mythological creature eluded me and I had to settle for a short spell on a bench with a fiberglass dancing girl from the Old West. She wasn't much of a talker, but she was dressed provocatively and seemed completely open to my wildly innapropriate advances.

Hondarider is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-2013, 02:49 PM   #340
Hondarider OP
Hero of the Stupid
 
Hondarider's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Adams, MA
Oddometer: 613
Having completed our pilgrimage, we loaded up our trinkets and hit the road once again. The highway was mercifully empty, the temperatures were in the mid 80s, and the sun was exactly at our backs. I chased my own shadow for miles as it stretched out 20 feet before me on the highway. It was at this instant when I had a perfect motorcycling moment...a picture perfect sky that went on forever...warm sun on my back...motor chugging along effortlessly...headset turned off...open face shield...prairie birds sitting on fence posts...green grass swaying to a warm breeze...no sense of how long I had been on the road...no idea what day it was...no stress...no plans beyond riding until I was tired...alone inside my own head. I remember thinking that this one moment might be the happiest I'd ever be and, if the world ended tomorrow, I'd be pretty happy with how things went for me. Honestly, it was that good. I could have stayed on the road forever.

We rode until the sun disappeared from the rearview mirrors and then it became apparent that it would be in our best interests to find a place to stop for the night. I hated to stop as I was having a great time.

I hit the GPS and it pointed to a Best Western just up the road in Murdo, South Dakota. Population 500.

With a name like "Murdo"...suspiciously close to "Murder"...I was sure that this was going to be another Motel 666 situation. I was actually hoping it would be just for the story material. We were running outof time and I really needed something noteworthy to talk about when I got back to work. I wasn't looking for much...maybe some sketchy characters in the parking lot...some police tape across the door of an adjacent room...a corpse in the pool...someone to kidnap MIke...

Instead, we found a really nice little motel, a clean room, friendly guests in the adjacent rooms, and two nice girls working at a pizza place across the street. There was literally nothing to complain about whatsoever. Imagine my disappointment.

We ate a large pepperoni pie with just a hint of cinamon in the crust, called the wives, and went to bed. It was hard to believe that we had woke in Estes Park that morning. It seemed like a million miles away.

Hondarider screwed with this post 10-16-2013 at 07:08 AM
Hondarider is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-2013, 03:47 PM   #341
Mike Yanagita
Gnarly Adventurer
 
Mike Yanagita's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2013
Location: So. Cal.
Oddometer: 280
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hondarider View Post
It was at this instant when I had a perfect motorcycling moment.
And you didn't stop to take a photo?
Mike Yanagita is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-2013, 03:56 PM   #342
live2ridetahoe
RN
 
live2ridetahoe's Avatar
 
Joined: Jul 2004
Location: Concord, CA
Oddometer: 1,190
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mike Yanagita View Post
And you didn't stop to take a photo?
Those moments are so few and far between, I never ruin them by taking a picture. I'd rather remember that moment in my mind's eye. The picture never does the moment justice anyway. Good on you for finding and enjoying the moment.

JG
live2ridetahoe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-2013, 05:22 PM   #343
Mike Yanagita
Gnarly Adventurer
 
Mike Yanagita's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2013
Location: So. Cal.
Oddometer: 280
That's a joke son. /Foghorn Leghorn
Mike Yanagita is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-2013, 06:03 PM   #344
Hondarider OP
Hero of the Stupid
 
Hondarider's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Adams, MA
Oddometer: 613
I specifically remember wishing that I could capture that perfect moment, but then the mere notion of trying to catch it...pulling over to get out the camera...knowing that film could never do it justice...wishing there was a way to capture the smells...the sensation of motion...straining against the force of the wind...the sound of the engine...the warmth of the sun...the comradery of a friend tracking just off to your left...even the taste of the air...

...and then its gone.

You can't capture it for posterity. All you can do is enjoy it, commit it to memory, and then head off in search of the next one. I suppose that's what keeps people riding despite the risks, the weather, and the angry girlfriends.
Hondarider is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-26-2013, 04:13 AM   #345
Varkenjaab
Middle Age Crisis
 
Joined: Jan 2012
Location: Sydney Ortsraylia
Oddometer: 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hondarider View Post
There are actually 2 sides to the card...not sure if this was the complete version...just checked to see if it was still on my computer.

I know you've already been docked a mark for not having your list in alphabetical order (an almost unforgivable oversight to any self respecting AR) but.......surely, SURELY you should have each item weighed and noted so as to ensure a perfect weight balance
Varkenjaab is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Share

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

.
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


Times are GMT -7.   It's 01:13 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ADVrider 2011-2014